Dear Diary Entry 4

Dear Diary,

Today is my BFF's birthday. Lotsa people think we're still about 15 for using that term. We really don't care. Part of us IS still 15. The other part, still 10. We're going to see New Kids on the Block in 2 months and 25 days. It's obvious we aren't concerned with the fact that we're 28, married (not to each other) and each have two girlies and that it's possibly time for us to grow up.

It's just not gonna happen. Yet.

She's one of those friends that you get later in your life, you wish you'd had all the years before, but it's where you are now that's the reason you're friends now. She's the friend I'll have til I'm 99.

She's the friend that, when hanging out, my husband waits by the phone til I get home. He's just sure one of these times we'll be picked up for some sort of misdemeanor.

She's the friend who painted my toenails while I lay in a hospital bed recovering from having cancer surgery. She was there every day I was in the hospital.

She's sarcastic and mean. She's the most selfless woman I know.

She doesn't ask what she can do for me, she just does whatever, whenever, always.

She's just as bad at pool as I am. She loves Dirty Dancing ("Nobody puts Baby in a corner") as much as I do.

She loves Conway Twitty. But I love her anyway.

When Josh and I talk about moving away from here, neither of us can imagine leaving Amber. Pretty sure we're stuck here forever!

Tonight we're going to Red Robin to celebrate her. I can't wait. She's worth celebrating.

Amber-I love you. I think you're great. I can't imagine my days without you. You are the bestest friend a girl could have. And if it were legal...LOL :) Well...ya know.

Baby Stains

Help.

My children have some purdy cute clothes.

But one of those children loves dirt. And mud. And anything sticky and yucky.

So, her clothes get nasty. I pre-treat the stains.

To no avail.

The other child has these massive diaper explosions. I'm thinking diapers should be like a full body cast so nothing can leak out.

But since they aren't, she leaks. She leaks something fierce.

So, her clothes get yucky. I pre-treat the stains.

To no avail.

Help. What do you use to get out stains?

Because this is the alternative...

The Move from Montana

Most heard phrase this weekend, "I wish I were dead."

Kinda sums up the weekend. :)

Crazy stinkin' trip that's all I gotta say.

We arrived in Butte, Montana at about 1 a.m. My lovely children had slept most of the way and thought it'd be fun to be awake after the trip.

We didn't get much sleep that night.

The plan was to load all of their belongings on Saturday and leave early Sunday morning. My husband gets this brilliant idea to load their stuff and take off. It's supposed to be about an 8-9 hour drive.

But, when you have six adults, five children (3 and under) two dogs, and four vehicles (2 of which get terrible mileage) an 8 hour trip turns into 11.

OH MY SOUL.

The kids, I must say, were amazing. My sister's kids aren't used to such long drives, so I was quite impressed that they did so well. I drove my sister's van with my mom, sister and three of the kids. Josh had Jaylee with him and my BIL had their youngest. And my very wonderful FIL came with us, so he drove his truck and the biggest trailer.

The trip went great, for the most part...

Dear Girl in the convertible BMW who flashed my husband,

Did you even think about what you were doing? A man with his little girl with him and you lift your shirt?! Your actions were repulsive. That man is a husband. He has a wife. He doesn't need to see you and all that you "offered". Wouldn't you rather save that body of yours for your own husband, instead of sharing for the entire freeway? Disgusting. Uncalled for. I have no more words for you.

Seriously. My knuckles were white. I was shaking. I was crying. I was beyond mad. What right did that girl have to do that?!

I was gently reminded (thank You, Lord) that I have been that foolish girl.

Before I was informed.

Before I realized what something like that does to a man.

Images like that, showing your body to a man...that's stuck there. They can't erase it. As much as the may want to, they can't. Men are different from women. Yes, we may think a guy has a nice body. But usually, for most women, that's that. We don't have those images flash back in our mind. We don't stand at the kitchen sink, doing dishes and remember that guy from a week ago who had a nice rear. Men...men remember. That's the way they tick.

It's not wrong. That's how they were created. But it's our responsibility as women to dress and act appropriately so as not to make a man stumble.

That girl who flashed my husband...her actions...not so appropriate. Not at all.

Anyway, off my soapbox.

We got my sister moved. We got them unloaded.

They are officially back in WA!!!

After the laundry

dishes and other housework is done, I'll fill you in on our trip to Montana.

It was a good trip but we're glad to be home and so glad to finally have Derek, Erica and the kids back in WA.

Dear Diary Entry 3

I thought it would be fun today to find my diary from high school and copy what I'd written from August 21st. Yeah, not so much. Too much junk about some dumb boy I liked waaay too much, a pretty unhealthy deal. I think I embarrass myself enough on my blog, I don't need to make it worse! :) It's amazing how much has changed since then.

Dear Diary,

Another week has come and gone. We leave for Montana tomorrow and I've completely procrastinated on everything I should have done before our trip.

Procrastinating is huge for me. Should be my middle name.

I really need to start organizing my life a little better. It's amazing how much peace I have when things are organized, when I have my priorities in line.

I've been in awe of my husband these last few days. It just amazes me how much he loves my family. I know I'd do anything for his family, too, but he's putting his love for them into action. The work he's done is incredible. Tonight I'm planning a special dinner for him after the girls go to bed. Just the two of us. Should be fun.

I've been trying to spend more quality time with Jaylee and I really feel that's helping our relationship. It's easy to think that I spend time with her since I'm here all day with her but that's not necessarily the case. It's easy to get wrapped up in dishes, laundry, vacuuming, blogging, Alison, and just not spend the time with her that she needs.

Yesterday, I laid on her bedroom floor with her and we were coloring. A little while into it, she starts to pray, "Thank You, Lord for the coloring. Thank You, Lord for the fun. Thank You, Lord for Shadow. Amen."

So sweet. I love her heart.

Woot Woot!

Sister has a house!

They wouldn't have been homeless; I offered for them to live here.

Guess the idea of 4 adults and 5 children, three and under didn't appeal to them.

Fancy that.

What to do what to do...

Sigh...

It's been a very long day. A very long, unproductive day.

My least favorite kind.

It's after 10 pm and my husband is still at my in-laws in the rain, trying to figure out how to put a small pickup and trailer on a flatbed trailer that we're towing to Montana in three days. He tried every which way, to the point I decided a small UHaul trailer was going to be a must. My man never gave up. It's going to look a little crazy but he managed to get 'em up there. Thankfully, as that will save us about 125 bucks in gas.

We move my sister in three days. Have I mentioned she has no home yet to move into? Crazy, huh? I know the Lord is just stretching it out as long as possible just for funsies. He's kicking back with popcorn, all the while knowing He has the perfect house just waiting for them. Why show them early when He can wait til the last possible second? Because He's God, He can get away with that kinda stuff. :)

I'm struggling right now. Having a heart issue I suppose. Today I was utterly frustrated with my car. My car that turned 199,000 miles on it today. My list is long for all the reasons I hate her. I know I should love her. She at least gets me to and fro. But I still can't stand her. Right now she sounds like she has a turbo. When I accelerate it sounds like I'm a plane on a runway. It's great. And just this morning she started some sort of flapping noise. Hmmph.

Since the rig to the right hasn't sold we're considering trading her in. I went to a dealership today and fell in love. A vehicle with cupholders! My $4 coffees wouldn't spill!

Josh hasn't seen her yet but he's heard enough about her today to know how much I love her. Since it's been a busy evening, we haven't had much time to discuss it. There are pros and there are cons.

The biggest con being we'd have vehicle payments again. A small one but a payment's a payment.

The biggest pro being...it has CUPHOLDERS!!! Okay, so that's not the biggest pro but it's a pretty good one! A perk is that it only has 18,000 miles on it. I really like that part. And it's red. Ohhh how I love me a red rig.

So, I guess we'll see.

I go look at another house tomorrow for Erica. I love doing this. It's one of my favorite things to go looking at houses. Maybe because we've been in ours for 9 years and I'm sure I'll shrivel and die here, so it's fun to see other stuff.

Please pray this place works out and that there's no application process, as of tomorrow, we'll have only FOUR days til they're back in Washington.

Mt. Rainier

It's okay when you're three

Josh took Jaylee to the parts store tonight.

He comes home with this story...

"So, I think it's a good thing Jaylee's not a little older or she may have been embarrassed by what happened tonight. We leave the store and she wants to race to the truck. As we're running, her skirt falls to her ankles."

Yes, yes it's good she's three and not 13.

Then it would have been tragic instead of hilarious.

Is it really considered camping...

if you get a shower every night and have electricity?

Yeah, I didn't think so.

But this last weekend was my kinda campin' I tell ya!

Josh's parents went up to Mt. Rainier last weekend and then Josh and the girls and I went up on Thursday to take over the campsite. They let us keep their fifth wheel and let me just tell you, it was glorious.

It's so easy to take Mt. Rainier for granted since I can see it out my living room window and it's only a two hour drive to actually be at the mountain itself.

I don't have pictures to show today since I'm the only person left on earth without a digital camera. Hopefully I'll get up to Yakima again today to get them developed.

Anyway.

We spent four days and three nights in a fifth wheel, with a toilet (unlike the days when I actually had to live in a fifth wheel and use a McDonald's happy meal bucket....) (now those were the days) and a shower.

Friday we drove into Enumclaw for some necessities, like baby wipes because I've never had a baby before or anything and somehow forgot to pack them...and a 3.99 bottle of wine, because I'm high class like that, and coffee creamer...because my husband is a crabby man should he have coffee with no creamer. Oh, and so I could get a Starbucks fix. So, yeah, we were pretty ridiculous, drive two hours to be at the mountain and then drive another 40 minutes so we can get our city fix.

Saturday, not a good time was had by all. And by all, I mean me. We went for a hike. I don't like to hike. I'm more of a one to two mile kinda hiker, if I must hike. Husband thought he should push my buttons and make me hike for six. Yes, six! With a baby and a three year old.

Sorry, friends, I'm just not hard core like that. I much prefer sitting by a fire, playing cards, eating too much, and being too loud after quiet time in the campground. That, to me is priceless.

Instead, I was one unhappy lady. I didn't moan and groan at the time. I knew I could save it up to share with you. :)

There was one plus to the hike.

My tattoo that I have on my left arm...it's in Chinese. And ever since I got it, I've been scared that it reads, "Smells like cow patties." Instead of, "to mourn my father."

'Cause with tattoo parlors, ya just never know.

So, we're hiking and we see a group of Chinese people. I'm trying to have Josh walk on my left side so that way they can't see my arm. He wasn't understanding my sudden closeness and moved away from me. We stopped to talk with them and one of the girls asks what my arm says.

I brilliantly came up with this line....

"Uhhhh...."

She asked if something happened to my dad. And then confirms what it says.

Oh YAY! It doesn't say anything ridiculous! So, even though I'd rather not have the tattoo where it is (I've been considering having it removed) I'm glad to know it actually says what I thought it did.

Back to camping...

After the hike from H-E-double hockey sticks, we all crashed for about an hour. Then had dinner. Then went down by the water to watch the sun set on the mountain.

We left for home yesterday morning and came home to 100+ degree heat. Bluuuhhck!

Luckily it was only 80 in our house when we got here. My house is a train wreck at the moment and I think the maid called in sick because she hasn't shown up yet today. She's fired...

Guess I better get to work in her place then.

Hopefully I'll have pictures of our trip to show tomorrow.

Have a great Monday!!!

Dear Diary Entry 2

Dear Diary,



Sigh.



We watched some home videos last night. We only watched a few minutes of one. It was from December. And Jaylee seems so little. She was dancing around and being silly. There was a Veggie Tale playing in the background. She actually looked chubby in the face. She's nowhere near chubby now!



Gone are those chubby little cheeks. She's long and lean. And growing so quickly. I was bawling through the video.



Not so long ago she was all little and snuggly. She couldn't walk or talk. Or feed herself. I had to change her diapers.



I remember wanting her to reach each milestone early. I wanted her to eat baby food and sit up. I wanted her to crawl and walk and talk.



While she never reached any milestone waaay before her age, looking back, I wish I hadn't wished the time away. I wish I had just taken the time to enjoy where she was. I know I'm not making any sense. I don't really care.



She had such a sweet personality, she loved me and we got along. Now, I feel all we do is butt heads. I feel like she'd rather always be with her daddy.



We're leaving for Mt. Rainier in a couple of hours, so I really have no business writing. I should be getting ready. It's a trip that will be good for us, to get away, have some fun. Just seems that whenever we leave home, someone gets sick. Jaylee and I still aren't feeling well from the last go around and Ali has a runny nose.



Oh, the joys.

When Having a Cell Phone Would Have been Beneficial

I'm house hunting for my sister.

Yesterday I took my children to see a couple of houses. It was about a 30 minute drive, driving to an area I'm not too familiar with. The directions the guy gave me were flawless. I drove straight to the first house.

And immediately wanted to roll up my windows, lock my doors, and run for my life.

Not the safest part of town folks.

A neighbor lady showed me the place. The house itself-not so bad. I could live there. It was just the neighborhood. It was a lil sketchy.

So, I drive on to the next house on the other side of town. Which actually put me in a different town altogether...

I check out the place. It's nice, she'll probably live there. But as I'm leaving...

I can tell the clutch is about to go out on my car. It just felt a wee bit funny. So, I dug into the reserves of all the things my husband has taught me in 12 years and one of those is how to drive a stick shift without your clutch.

He's pretty cool, I tell you.

And I felt that way, too, after driving around Yakima with no clutch.

I found a payphone, which I tell you are almost extinct in this cell phone day and age. Mind you, it's about 97 degrees outside and I have two small (needy) children. Both of whom are hungry, thirsty, sleepy and crabby...oh, and crying.

I put in my three quarters, yes, three!!! I remember when it was 25 cents to call someone who cared. For seventy-five cents they better care when I call!

The blasted thing ate my money.

I remembered I have a calling card. So, I used it to call Josh. Poor guy was quite worried about me. I felt bad for burdening him with my troubles but I just wanted to know that the car would make it home. He said, "it should." That was comforting.

Across the street from me was a car lot and a cell phone store.

I seriously considered going to both places.

I didn't.

After several rounds of pay phones, trying to reach that girl who I'm house hunting for, I gave up and headed home. I asked the Lord to just puhlease get us home.

He did. And I think He fixed my car while He was at it, because the clutch seems to be working just fine today.

And sister of mine, you know I love you. I only wanted to wring your neck for a little bit. :)

Call us Crazy

I'm pretty sure we've fallen off the Normal Wagon, the husband and me.

Josh's grandparents, Nana and Papa, got a new fridge. So, last night we helped them pick it up from Sears and got 'er all set up at their house.

Nana and Papa are two of my most favorite people in all the world. Nana is the lady who politely picked up my piece of chicken that I flung near her plate when I was just 16 and was at Josh's parents for dinner the first time. Oh my how embarrassing...

And Papa is the man who taught me to love some Cribbage.

When we found out I was pregnant with Alison, these two started praying fervently for a boy. There were already four great-granddaughters, they wanted themselves a boy to carry on the name.

Josh and I were just sure the Lord would answer their prayers, seeing as how they're not so young and all and He'd answer the prayers more of the old folks.

We were wrong. May 4th, we added the fifth great-granddaughter. We were seriously scared to call Nana and tell her that the family name would not be continuing...at least not from us. She assured us she was okay with that.

And we believed her.

Til last night.

As we were leaving, she hugs Jaylee, talks some baby talk to Ali and as I'm strapping the girls in she says to me...

"Now it's time for that boy!"

I laughed at her.

Silly crazy lady.

She says, "Now, I don't want to interfere but we'd love a boy in the family."

I continued laughing. Nervously.

Husband comes around the side of the house and she puts an arm around him, to soften him up I'm sure...

"Now Joshua," she starts, "I don't want to interfere."

"Honey, she wants us to have another baby."

He laughs but I'm pretty sure he'd rather not have. Pretty sure the laugh was for Nana's sake.

"Now Nana, I don't know about that. We'll have to see what God says about that."

I'm pretty much wanting to hide, I'm not sure I want to know what God says about that. What if He wants us to have another baby!?

She sends us on our way but I'm pretty sure she's sending up prayers asking the Lord for another great-grandchild, one preferably with boy parts.

We get home. I'm doing dishes. Josh is sitting at the kitchen table.

"Do we want another baby?" He asks while holding our chubby little THREE MONTH OLD.

I whip my head around. I'm torn. Just recently I've been panicking about Ali being our last child. Would I feel our family was complete if it was just the four of us? I've always wanted lots of kids...til I realized how much my body doesn't like to be pregnant.

"I don't know, do we?" Seriously. Torn.

He goes on to remind me of my most recent pregnancy. The puking. Literally all day for four months. Laying on the bathroom floor. Praying for some reprieve. I lost 15 lbs. I liked that part! :) Then, once that subsided, it was the nerve in my back, making it almost impossible to be comfortable. And then the not sleeping from March-May. Oh, who am I kidding...the not sleeping from March until now! And of course there's the part of the giving birth. Which went relatively fast this time around but still how it HURT! Someone should invent drugs so that it doesn't hurt so bad. He doesn't need to remind me of all these things.

It wasn't that long ago. I clearly remember.

But I look into the eyes of my two girls who are worth every minute of puking and laboring.

And I think...yeah, I could do it again.

And we had to pull over...

We were gone for the weekend. The trip was short lived because the girls got sick. Sick as in projectile vomiting sick.

On our five hour drive home, Jaylee got bored.

Bored to the point that she decided being naughty would be more fun than sitting like a good girl.

I turned around and looked at her.

"If you continue that, we'll pull the car over and spank you."

I then looked at Josh, and whispered, "did I really just say that. that's a line our parents used."

From the back, in her carseat...

"Wellll, I want a spankin'."

Oh.my.word. So, Josh pulled over. I couldn't let her get away with that. It was one of the hardest parenting moments I've had.

She tried to call my bluff.

She lost.

Even though I knew I had to show her I wasn't kidding, it was still extremely difficult. Being a parent is the hardest job ever, sometimes!

There are days (like today) that I consider turning in a letter of resignation.

Cannot believe I forgot to tell you

what happened in church on Sunday!

There's been like this amazing baby boom in our church. Thinkin' about 5 or 6 babies were born within 2-3 weeks of each other.

Ali being one of them.

The back row of the sanctuary is dedicated to parents with infants so that we can leave if they get fussy or what have you.

So far Alison had been excellent. She'd nurse when we got to church, stay awake through worship, and then fall asleep as Pastor Tony started to preach (not a sign of his preaching, I promise!)

Ohhh but this last Sunday...

She goes through her routine, eat, listen to worship and service begins. We're listening to Tony read through some Scripture and it's pretty quiet.

Til Ali lets 'er rip.

Uh huh.

She did.

She filled her pants in service.

My word, I thought Josh and I were going to die.

My aunt was sitting in front of us and her whole body starts to shake because she's trying so hard not to laugh out loud.

All the other parents of little ones are smirking and I'm sure praising the Lord it was our baby instead of theirs.

Josh leans over, "uh, Sarah, you may want to leave, you know...in case she does it again."

So, I left the service. My uncle opens the door for me and says, "good one, Sarah."

Riiiight, 'cause it was me.

I just couldn't believe how loud it was. And why she had to wait until it was quiet. Why not during music?

You know, when no one would have been the wiser.

Dear Diary

So, if I were to write in a diary, here's what an entry may look like:



I panicked last night. Ali's three months old already. I picked her up and squeezed her, nuzzling into the rolls of her neck. She squeaked. I can't get enough of her. It amazes me to think that a month ago it was hard to be around her since she cried all the time. Now, she just smiles and gurgles and kicks her feet and throws her arms all around. She's adorable and she melts my heart every time I look at her.


When we sat down to dinner last night, holding hands to pray for our food, Jaylee begins to pray.


"Thank You, Lord, for not whining. Amen."


It was really hard not to bust out laughing. Josh and I smiled at her and said, "Amen." We've really been trying to teach her to not whine and I guess the other night when she was, Josh asked her to talk to Jesus about it.


She's so beautiful. Inside and out. I love her smile and her eyes are so sweet. She has such a sparkle about her and I pray it only gets brighter.


I've been quick tempered lately (what's new, huh?) and my husband has noticed. Two mornings ago he reminded me to speak to Jaylee in love. Made me sad that he had to remind me but I was thankful for his wisdom. Jaylee and I had a better day that day.


It's so easy sometimes to take Josh for granted. He's so faithful to go to work each day and come home to us each evening. I know I need to do better at showing him how much I love him and how thankful I am for him. We have some added expenses this month and he's putting in a lot of overtime to cover those expenses, he works so hard. Never complaining about being tired or overworked.


I love this man.


The other night he pissed me off pretty good. It's hard for me to be upset with him because he's so amazing in so many ways. But...I let myself be mad. And instead of letting the anger build, I decided to tell him. It didn't change what was happening but it felt good to get it off my chest and I was able to continue my evening without being too upset.


Erica is moving back. I'm excited. Too excited. I have all these daydreams that our families will get together every week for dinner and games. I want to plan all this stuff to do. I need to be logical and realize that it probably won't be like in my daydreams. We do have real lives to lead.


I'm tired. I think it's because I'm not doing enough. I notice that the more I do, less I feel tired. I have more energy when I'm up and at 'em, so to speak. I'm so good at making lists of things I need to get done but don't always follow through the best. I need to just do something. Something is better than nothing.

I almost went to a Weight Watchers meeting the other night. I'm sick of these 15 lbs that haunt me on a daily basis. I just can't see paying the 40 bucks a month to go when I lost 35 lbs a few years ago all on my own. It just seems harder now. I don't know why.

My 10 year class reunion is coming up. To go, or not to go...as the girl voted, "Most Likely to be Seen on Jerry Springer" I wouldn't want to disappoint ya know. But it's at a winery, which I'm totally all for...except I'm so much more of a casual kinda girl. I'd rather not have to get dressed up and try to dress in a fashion that I'm so not. I like wine and all but I'm more of a twist-top kinda wine girl! :)

My mother lives closer to us now. I'm enjoying that. We went and saw her last night just for funsies.

I'm not pleased with our small town. Driving through it basically disgusts me. It's just yucky here. I want to be content, I really do. But it's so hard when it's dirty and yucky and I think I should just stop there...

Yes, that is what an entry would look like. Maybe every Thursday should be Dear Diary.

I just wanted 30 minutes, just 30!

I'm selfish.

I'll admit it.

And basically...I'm okay with that.

I'm one of those that needs some alone time. Some me time. I have two small children, so I feel I'm owed some me time.

Man, the more I write, the worse I'm feeling about myself.

Last night, I decided I needed some of that me time.

I decided to take a book and go to Starbucks, get my coffee (salivating right now thinking 'bout 'er) sit outside and read for about 30 minutes. Just have some time to breathe. Some time to not answer the same question for the 37th time. Some time without breastfeeding (only 9 months to go!) And just enjoy being alone.

What ended up happening was I took the children to Starbucks. With a book. Got my coffee. Sat outside. And read for about 30 seconds. Jaylee announced she was bored and wanted to go home.

So, we went home.

I've decided it's going to be about 18 years until I get some me time.

I'm tryin' to be okay with that.

Did I really say $35?!

Yeah, I did.

I'm such a moron! :)


35 bucks turned in to 52 bucks.


Bugger.


Before I talk about my grocery shopping habits and what not, let me just say this...


Vacuuming my house and cleaning off my countertops with Pine-Sol make me a happy girl. It's amazing how just having the house vacuumed makes the entire house feel cleaner.


Random, huh?


Yeah, that's how I roll.


Okay, so let me give you some information on my grocery shopping-ness. I can make up words, it's my blog.

First off, sooo many of you that I read are so way more better at all of this shopping stuff. (Don't you love that sentence? How many errors were in it?! I don't really care.) I'm just trying to get my point across that I know so many of you all get the whole shopping trip deal.

For so long, I didn't. And am actually still trying to get it.

And in case there's a girlie out there who doesn't read all of you that I do, and she shops the way I used to...this one's for you, kid!


At 18, and a new bride, I had no clue about grocery shopping. I'd gone with my mom several times growing up, but she really had no rhyme or reason to her shopping. Well, I guess she had a reason...we needed food. She wasn't a thrifty shopper or coupon clipper or anything like that. She got our staples and out the store she went. She's always hated shopping.


So...18 and here I was. My mom made me a list while we were on our honeymoon of everything I'd need to get for our kitchen.


I bought all of it. At Safeway. Didn't care about prices or anything. I just went off the list and bought everything my mother said I needed.


9 trillion dollars later...


Okay, it wasn't that bad, actually. I believe I bought all of it for under $150 and that included a mop, broom, dust pan, t.p, paper towels, spices, our food...all of it. I was excited when I got my receipt and saw the savings I'd had. I hadn't tried to get anything on sale but was excited for whatever had been.

So, each week for about seven years, I'd throw some random stuff down on a piece of paper and go buy whatever I wanted. No menu plan. Just a grocery list. I'd come home with a hundred dollars worth of groceries (for two people, mind you) and then wonder, "what can I make for dinner?" It was so discouraging and I wasn't sure how to make it better.


I continued my grocery shopping in pretty much the same manner until about three years ago. Then, I made a baby step toward my better Menu Managment. (totally just made that one up!) I started taking my Safeway flier and looking to see what was on sale. I then would write out what I was going to make for dinners for the week. I did notice a huge drop in what I was spending but I felt like my cupboards were filling up with food we weren't eating...

My piece of paper would kinda look like this:

Monday B whatever you wanna fix yerself
Monday L leftovers of whatever we had the night before
Monday D Tacos

Tuesday-Sunday followed suit.

With dinners like Tacos, Enchiladas, Spaghetti, Roast, and I'd rotate those. I wasn't very creative, and I didn't yet have amazing blog friends that posted their menus or recipes for me to learn from.

But I'd panic if I didn't have Tacos on Monday for dinner. I felt like since I put it on Monday, we had to eat it on Monday. And if we didn't eat it on Monday, well then, we went to McDonald's.

I had terrible planning ahead habits.

Now, and probably for the last year or so (after learning from others) I have started going through my cupboards and have been taking inventory of what's already in my pantry, fridge and freezer before I make out my menu and grocery list. I know that may seem so obvious to many of you. Duh, Sarah, didn't you know to do that?!

Uh, no.

I didn't.

I've now learned to make out my menu like this (and this is my actual menu for this week) (many of my recipes coming from Gayle who gets some of hers from recipezaar)

Veggie Burgers w/Corn on the Cob
Taco Joes w/Green beans (we had this last night but I didn't make the beans) I'll post the recipe later, kinda reminds me of sloppy joes but a bit different.
Latke's w/zucchini
Black Bean and Tortilla Bake w/salad
Broccoli Rice (I have a bunch of frozen spinach, so I'm going to try to substitute spinach for broccoli, we'll see how it goes)
Fiesta Crockpot Chicken (I'm making this on Saturday when we go visit some family, it's delish)
Chicken Salad Sandwiches (making this on Saturday for lunch for family)

Instead of writing each meal on a certain day and feeling like I had to make it on that day, I just write out the meals I have food for and make them on whatever day I choose.

Now for my latest-supposed-to-be-$35-shopping-trip...

On Friday night we were up in Yakima to help decorate for VBS, we got to Yakima a little early and drove by a bakery outlet. I am always wanting to go to that oulet but it's closed on Sundays (or so I thought) so I've never been in til Friday.

There wasn't a huge selection but I came out with:

2 loaves of country wheat bread
2 bags of bagels

for $5.55

I was thrilled. Why? Because at Safeway that would have cost me about $14.

Now, here's my grocery list.

black beans x 2
chicken
tortillas
coffee
packet of taco seasoning
onion x 2
*olives
white beans-dried
*pepperoni
corn on the cob
cheese
tomato x 3
bag of potatoes
celery
parsley
eggs

* didn't purchase

Now, next to each item on my grocery list I always write out about how much I think each one is. And I knew if I went to Wal Mart I could probably accomplish my 35 buck goal.

But I drove to Wal Mart and it was packed. And our Wal Mart grosses me out and makes me frustrated and I wasn't in the mood for that on Saturday.

So, I drove to Safeway. I love Safeway. It's clean. They know my name. There's excellent customer service. And they have a Starbucks inside. :)

I don't like Safeway prices. But I was and am often, willing to spend a little more on my groceries to leave there without pulling all of my hair out or wanting to commit a homicide.

Here's my receipt:

black beans 2 @ .89*
Safeway coffee 5.99*
taco seasoning .89*
great northern beans 1.35
tortillas 3.00*
18 pk lg eggs 3.29*
2 lb cheddar cheese 6.99*
2 gallons of milk 5.50*
b/s chicken breasts 4.90*
bananas 1.37*
celery 2.31
corn on the cob 1.00*
tomatoes 1.57
onion 2.19*
parsley
5# potato 3.49

I stuck pretty close to my list.

* indicates sale prices

grand total being.....$46.61+ 5.55 from outlet = $52.16

I'm okay with that.

A. because I enjoyed my grocery shopping experience (no screaming kids running thru the store (not mine, others), no rude workers, etc)
B. because I had to buy extra chicken since I'm making a couple of recipes for family this weekend.

I'm just going to keep trying to get it down.

Sorry for the long post but maybe it'll help someone who's trying to learn to grocery shop. This is what I've learned so far.

And I'm still learning.

She says some weird stuff

Jaylee comes out of her room right now,

"I'm not uh giiirl, I'm uh maaaan!"

Seriously, the kid cracks me up sometimes.

The times when I'm not wanting to put her up for adoption.

Life this Summer

I feel like it's been awhile since I've written about life in general. So, I'll just have one really long post about a buncha stuff.

Not even sure where to start.

Everything is good. Which is more than I can say for about three days ago or so.

Husband and me

Things were kinda crazy for us for a bit. Like a two month bit. I just felt we weren't the team we normally are. There were days where we'd say hello and goodbye and that 'bout summed 'er up. We were co-existing. And I was panicking. Finally, at 1:30 am the other night we talked. It was really good. We're both always so worried about hurting the other's feelings that we never want to say anything.

Basically, it was boiling down to the fact that we were showing love to each other in all the wrong ways. We discussed what would help each of us feel better and after about an hour of pouring out our hearts, we were both able to sleep better than we have in weeks.

The Girlies

I'm amazed, daily, at how quickly Jaylee is growing up. And how I need to start investing more time in training her.

Yesterday, we had some issues. I would have won "Worst Mama" award, hands down. She was being naughty and I didn't handle it the best. It took a 50 minute drive to calm me down. When she acts out, I truly believe it's my lack of parenting showing through. And basically it comes down to be me being embarrassed, of myself. There are days that I'm too tired to "pick my battle" and I'll let things slide. Putting off what I should have just taken care of in the first place so it didn't fester til I blow up.

She's a good girl. But I feel like her heart isn't in it sometimes. And I just don't know how to help her sometimes.

I'm probably not making any sense, huh? What's new? you ask. pffft.

Oh, Miss Alison. This baby has taught me so much in her three short months. First, you can love a screaming baby. She doesn't do this anymore but when she did, I loved her anyway. Second, judge not. I see why some moms are okay with having a babysitter when their babies are still so young. With Jaylee, I never felt I needed time away with her when she was tiny tiny. With Ali, it's been different. In the beginning (you know, like a month and a half ago) she was difficult and I needed fresh air, to clear my mind and rest for a minute or 57.

She's been so good these last three weeks. She's so happy and so sweet. She gurgles all of the time and it melts my heart. I've never heard a more vocal baby. I'm wondering if we're in for it later on. :)

Shadow

This guy has really been the best, ever. He just hangs out. He's happy to be inside or out. And I've said before, he's just so patient with Jaylee. We love him to pieces.

Stuff and Things

I'm a procrastinator and overbooker. :) This week has been pretty nuts. It's been good but really busy and it doesn't look to slow down until Monday. I planned too much in a week and right now I'm paying for it. I'm exhausted.

I have 10 butterflies to make for VBS (vacation bible school) that I've known about for a month. They are due....tonight. Have I made them yet??!!? next question, please... No, I haven't made them and I really hope Pia isn't reading this! I'm supposed to help decorate tonight, VBS starts on Monday, so, we'll be heading back up to Yakima again this evening.

Tomorrow is a double bday party for some family friends.

Sunday we move my mother back to the lower valley. Again.... (love you, mother)

Money and junk

I know we're not the only family affected by the economy right now, so I'm sure you'll hear me loud and clear when I say it's tight around here. We're getting back on our budget wagon and as hard as it is, we know we have to do it. Penciling everything out isn't pretty. Unfortunately it's causing stress in our household. When Josh's company was taken over last fall, there were changes. Amazingly, we've lost about $15,000 a year in pay. That's a huge amount for us. Sadly, I didn't realize it until recently how much it is. These coffees have got to stop!!! Another area is our grocery budget. We spend close to $60 a week in groceries for our family of four, which is actually just three since Ali is only nursing. I never thought that was much until I read over here at Gayle's. She has a family of six and she spends between 50-60 bucks a week on groceries. FOR SIX PEOPLE!!! Four of them are growing children.

So, I've decided...I'm going to try for 35 bucks, to feed my little family. It's going to take creativity and it's going to take some cutting back on meat. Which will be hard since my husband loves him some red meat! I believe I can do it and I believe that helping save the money my husband earns will be a stress reliever for him.

I'll probably do my grocery shopping on Sunday, so I'll let ya know how it goes.

Well, that's all for now. My girls will be up soon and I think I need to rest a few minutes before they are.

Have a great Friday and a wonderful weekend. Be safe!

*um, not real sure why some font is black and some is not...hmm...whatev.*