It Got a Lil Worse

Yesterday was bad and it got worse. Didn't think it could? Me either.

We don't use our microwave very often so we keep it in the basement. Since I'd had Bad Day of America, I hadn't thought out dinner. So, I decided on leftovers. I take a plate of Chicken Lasagna downstairs, put 'er in the microwave, wait a coupla minutes and then I head up the stairs with the plate.

I'm three steps away from the top, when I trip.

Plate goes flying into the front door, which my husband was opening.

Food spills everywhere. I freeze. He freezes.

And there was nothing else to do but laugh. I mean really. Getting mad all day didn't do anything good for my mood, so I decided to take a different outlook.

Poor Josh. He knew my bad day. And I think he thought this would send me over the edge. He made sure I was okay. And I was. Just a lil hurt pride is all. I have no idea what I tripped over.

He offered to take me out to dinner and I really wanted to take him up on his offer. But I put on my Big Girl Panties and made the back up recipe of Spaghetti.

I'm off to go get my glasses now. We'll see how that goes. Maybe I'll have a spectacular picture of myself for you later.

And if that doesn't make you wanna come back to visit me, I don't know what will.

A bad day gets good then bad again

Today is not my favorite Thursday of all time. Thursdays used to be amazing. Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Greysday, etc. But there is no Grey's because of this ridiculous strike. Pfft.

Anyway, this post is not about Grey's but about the fact that today has been a bad day and it would have a chance of looking up were Grey's Anatomy going to be on.

Today just didn't start off well. Jaylee and I just weren't hittin' it off today. My glasses were supposed to be in at the doctor's office today, I call and ask if they are in, she tells me they should be in at 11:30 but they close at noon, so I'm gonna have to hurry. I leave my house at 11:30, arrive there at 11:45, ask if they came, she seems annoyed and pretends to look for them.

"No, I guess they didn't arrive."

I drive the 15 minutes back to town, (this is where the day has a bright side) I decide to make myself feel a little better and I go through the McDonald's drive-thru. As I'm pulling away from the little speaker thing a girl comes out and posts a note about debit cards, I can't see it (no glasses) I pull up to the first window and she informs me they aren't taking debit cards.

And they don't take checks.

I know, you're thinking, "just pay cash!" I would, if I had some!

She says I can come in and use their ATM machine. Uh, no thanks, I came through the drive-thru because I'm lazy, I'm not going in there to be charged an extra $2.75 for my chicken sandwich.

"Let me talk to my manager." She says.

Figuring they'll let me do dishes to pay for my sandwich.

"We're going to give you your lunch for free today!"

"Whaaat?!"

"Free. Since our computer is down, you can have lunch free today."

I was ecstatic. Thrilled. Couldn't believe it. So happy.

Then the doctor's office calls my cell at 12:15, remember, they closed at noon.

"Oh hi, Sarah. Uh, it looks like your glasses were here."

Insert expletive here.

It's not about the accuracy

About a week or so before Christmas, I saw this post. Her blog is titled "Thoughts from an Overthinker" and I really do believe it suits her.

While reading this post though I was really hit hard with what she said. And I began wondering, why do we celebrate Jesus' birthday in December? Why are nativity scenes shown with the wisemen there?

I was really bothered.

I talked to my mom about it on Christmas Eve before our church service and she advised me to just ask Pastor Tony. There were quite a few people at church and he seemed busy, so I decided not to ask.

I didn't need to.

When Pastor Tony got up to pray before our service started, one of the first things he said was that the day, the season, was not about the accuracy.

Then, after some Christmas songs, and the Men's Choir, Pastor Tony got back up to share a bit.

He said again that Christmas is not about getting hung up on the accuracy of when Jesus was born. He said more than celebrating His birth, we need to celebrate His death and resurrection! Amen!

I was so overwhelmed. I know that the message wasn't just for me that night but it really felt like it. I was just so thankful to Jesus for answering my questions. He's always so loving in the way He teaches us.

**********************

We had a great Christmas. Well, it was great after we made the trip to a sleazy little mini-mart to get a gallon of milk because I had forgotten to get some the day before. I was glad that it was a sleazy mini-mart because they didn't care that I was wearing my nightgown and ragged slippers in there.

Josh gave me a new paper cutter, that I desperately needed. The measurements on my old one were off, so my scrapbook layouts wouldn't come out right and I'd get a lil peeved. He also gave me an attachment to my KitchenAid mixer. I shredded a 2 lb. brick of cheese in about 37 seconds last night, it was beautiful!

We gave Jaylee some clothes and the game Don't Spill the Beans. She calls it "Bob" and the only reason I can come up with is that the bowl for the beans is red and looks a little like Bob the tomato from Veggie Tales. But, who knows, maybe she's just a dork like her mama.

The greatest gift was a phone call from Treena, my sister-in-law. We're talking about the gifts we've received and then all of a sudden, she's in my driveway! Her family came from Portland and the surprise was so much fun. They're coming this weekend to celebrate Christmas but they wanted to visit for the day. Loved it.

I didn't take pictures with my digital camera, so I'll have to share them with you after they are developed.

I hope you and yours had a very Merry Christmas!

A Rerun

I'm going to repost a post I wrote a few months back. Mainly for myself. But maybe for you, too.

I see a lot of the stuff I wrote about creeping back into my life. And I'm not pleased with it. Some out of my control (may talk about it later) and some, like the issue with my cell phone and trips to Wal Mart, that I can control.

This time of year, when I know I'm getting presents from my husband, I always want diamonds. Silly, huh? Yeah, I know. But it's true. And one year I got them. Waaay before Jaylee was born but I got them. And I love them. I love shiny stuff.

Like diamonds and new vehicles....anyway...here's my original post:

I have a confession to make. I don't always listen to Christian music. *gasp* I know, you're all horrified but it's the truth. I feel better now just getting that out there.

Okay, bye.

Just kidding! :) I'm silly, huh? Anyway...

On Saturday we were driving somewhere, thinking it was SMT, Saturday Morning Tradition, we've done this for almost six years, we get up early, go get coffees and sometimes donuts, come home and get to work on our house or lounge around and wait for someone to need my husband's help. This weekend it was me needing his help. I really want our junk room complete. Anyway...again. So, we're driving and Sheryl Crow starts singing "Soak up the Sun." Totally, love the song. Right now I'm trying to think of all the words to make sure I really want to state that I love the song, can't remember them all, so maybe I should just say I like the beat. I'm starting to ramble. I did have a point to this blog, for once.

"It's not about having what you want, it's 'bout wanting what you got." I almost started spelling it the way I hear it in my head..."Snot bout having wut you waaant, sbout wanting wuuut youuu gottt" Now, I did spell it the way I hear it. Please don't stop reading. I seriously have a point.

Somewhere.

That line of the song really resonated with me. I am so quick to want what someone else has. So quick. Sometimes it's something material, sometimes not. I have been getting better but when Josh and I were first married, eight and a half years ago, I wanted. And I wanted some more.

My husband wanted to please me. So, he gave. And he gave some more.

I wanted a Honda Accord, we got one. I wanted a newer one, we got one. I wanted a dishwasher, we got one. I wanted a beagle, we got one (free to good home btw) I kept wanting. And I was so selfish. I was so ignorant. So blind to see what it was doing to me.

To us.

It didn't stop when it came to the cars. In 2002 I decided I wanted a 2003 Mitsubishi Lancer. I got one. It was beautiful. It was red. It was mine.

It was ridiculous.

We almost had to file bankruptcy because the payments were almost $400 per month. We were so stressed. We were miserable. I felt like I was drowning. Looking back it reminds me of the Veggie Tales movie with Madam Blueberry. She shopped at Stuff Mart and she always wanted more but each time she got more, she still was not happy. That was me.

Honestly, it's getting better. I truly believe it's a heart issue. I was not walking with the Lord. I wasn't seeking Him out, wasn't asking for His peace. I was just living for myself. Trying to fill a void.

Oh but I was so empty.

I'm not saying everything is perfect now. It's definitely not. I told you at the beginning I still covet. But I'm learning to repent of it, I'm learning to want what I already have. There was so much stress in the "stuff" that I had or did. So, I started eliminating it, a lot of it cold turkey.

1. My cell phone
2. Credit card debt
3. My car, it was paid for but we sold it to pay off debt. And, the reason it was paid for...instead of filing for bankruptcy, we remortgaged our house to pay it off. We will always be so thankful to my Uncle Eric who suggested that to us. Otherwise, well...I don't know what would have happened.
4. Daytime TV, no more soap operas!
5. Unhealthy friendships
6. Wal Mart, I used to go there a few times a week. Not for anything inparticular, just to go. I always left with at least $30 worth of stuff. Now, I don't go there at all. It's literally saving me hundreds each month.
7. Coffee. Oh, this was so hard to cut down on. But now, instead of 7-8 times a week, we go twice. Once on Wednesdays between noon and 3, because it's double punch day and 50 cents off each drink and then on Saturdays for SMT. This is saving us close to $200 per month.

I'm sure there are more things I could cut back on, but for now, this is where I am.

The relief that I feel being happy with what I have is amazing. It feels good to get out of bed in the morning. I'm not scared to check my mail. I'm learning to be okay with going to the mall and not walking out with a brand new pair of Lucky jeans, but oh how I miss them!

I've been blessed. I love my life. I love my husband. I love our daughter. I love our house. I love our '85 suburban, even tho' she didn't want to start this morning!

I think the Lord wants to see what we'll do with what He's already given us before He'll bless us further. Does that make sense? It does to me. I've really felt Him telling me that lately.

Sorry this post is so long. It was just really on my heart on Saturday and we were gone all day yesterday so I didn't get a chance to talk to you.

I pray you have just the best day today.

Tacky Christmas Sweaters Act II

You thought we'd boxed them up til next year, didn't you?

Oh, no. Last night was FACTCP (First Annual Culver/Thiemann Christmas Party) at our house. Amber decided we needed to bust the bad girls back out one last time before next Black Friday.

I made a new recipe, it wasn't too terrible, it's hard for me to find something to cook for this family because they don't like mushrooms or onions. And almost everything I cook has onions in it! But I found something and had they not eaten at McDonald's two hours before coming to our house, I think they would've eaten a lil more.

My husband wasn't finished with his food but I took his plate anyway, I really wanted to get to the opening of gifts!

The pictures don't show it, but our families were there. I promise.

I was a little worried about posting the pictures with us throwing up our gang signs since we live in an area where that's a big deal. So, just know that we have no idea what signs (if any) that we're throwing in the pics. :)

Oh Christmas Tree...

Last night I almost took 'er down. No, not the kid, however, it was a thought a time or 12.

The tree.

The Christmas tree. It makes me crazy. I want her gone.

I asked the husband last night if we could take it down. He said that we could but he had a sad look on his face. So, I decided it could stay up. Wouldn't want to make him sad. He may not buy me any more gifts for Christmas.

Speaking of...

There are 3 trillion presents under my tree. One for me. And the one that is for doesn't weigh anything. I think he forgot to put whatever was supposed to go in the box in the box.

I'm rambling. I know this. I'm alright with it.

That tree is in some serious danger today.

When I Knew

My sister asked me, "When did you know you were in love with Josh and that you were going to marry him?"

I was 16 when this boy walked into church. He was wearing a Cross Country t-shirt, Lee jeans, a pair of well loved running shoes and he was sporting a flat top hair cut. I told my friend, Lindsey, "I'm going to marry that guy."

I didn't know his name. I'd never seen him before. All I knew from the moment I saw him was that he had no fashion sense whatsoever but he made my heart skip a beat and I wanted to marry him.

It would be another month or so before we were introduced. Linds and I were trying to think of what his name could be. I told her I thought he looked like a "Josh" and sure enough, wouldn't ya know it!

Lindsey was dating a guy named David at the time. He was a couple years older than we were and he said Josh was in his Sunday school class, so he'd introduce us.

We started dating, sorta, shortly after. I was sooo into him and he was sooo not into me. So, after a few months of hanging out, it fizzled. I've never cried so hard in my life. Not ever. I was only 16 but I was in love with him and I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him.

A few months of pity parties would go by and of course I had random crushes at school but I wanted Josh.

One day in May, I was in my room, and my mom came in to tell me that Josh was at the door.

"And he's wearing spandex." She said.

I go to the door and sure enough, there he is, in all his road bike, spandex glory. It was a sight, I tell you.

He asked if I wanted to go for a bike ride. And I remember having to remind myself to breathe. He was everything, everything to me.

After that bike ride we started hanging out again. I turned 17 in June, school let out and we started hanging out even more. We'd talk about marriage but not in the sense that it would be each other we were marrying. But I knew he was the one.

In August, he told me he loved me. Told me were going to get married. He said that on our bike ride in May, after he left my house to ride home, the Lord told him, "that's the girl you're going to marry."

In December we got engaged. And in July of 1998, a month after my 18th birthday, we got married.

So, Erica, there's a really long answer to your questions.

We Shouldn't Have Laughed

but we did. Because it was funny. And before you read this and make up your mind that we are bad parents, please know, we already know this.

We had to go to Yakima tonight for one last Christmas present. We're driving along, talking about whatever, when Jaylee yells from the backseat,

"Loooook!!! Santy Claus, drinkin' uh beeeer!"

We look. We see a billboard of Santa Claus, drinking a bottle of Coke. We bust out laughing. And we really shouldn't have. Because we saw another billboard about a mile away.

"Loooook, Mama!!! Santy Claus, drinkin' uh beeeer! The clown is drinkin' uh beer."

Tears. I had tears I was laughing so hard.

We already know we're bad parents. Now I'm just telling all of you.

Trip to Leavenworth

Here are some pictures from our trip to Leavenworth this last weekend.

Jaylee and Annie in the sled. Jaylee loved being pulled through town on the sled. It was really nice that James and Lindsey live so close to all the fun stuff.

Lindsey and me getting ready to go down the hill. It wasn't a big hill, but there were a ton of people and I was skerd to hit 'em!

Jaylee and Annie right before the town lighting. It was so cool. There were sooo many people. We sang a couple Christmas carols, there was a prayer, and then a countdown to the town being lit.

Some of the trees that were lit up.

Linds and me at Gustav's. I was really excited for food!


It was fun to hang out with them and go to their church. Their pastor cracked me up. He preached on Isaiah 9:6. The names of the Christ Child. Loved the message on hope.

Because I'm hoping for a dad for Christmas. And if I don't get one this Christmas, I'll continue being hopeful.

Because there is always next Christmas.

Another Christmas Memory

Since I only have eight days until Christmas, I thought it might be fun to post a few more Christmas memories until the big day!

After we moved out of the fifth wheel we moved to "The Icky House" and to tell you the truth I don't know that we upgraded any.

The good thing about the place was that it did have a bathroom, an upgrade from the McDonald's bucket, the bad thing (or one of the many) was the Hallway to H-E-double hockeysticks we had to go through to get to it. It was a scary scary hallway I tell you!

The house was like a big open room, cement floor with some outdoor carpet thrown down in the living room. The only source of heat a wood stove. In case you didn't know, you're supposed to buy the wood to put in the stove. You're not supposed to send your daughters to the neighbors when it's dark and take a few pieces.

It was a wonderful time in our lives! It's so fun to be in 8th grade and live in "The Icky House" :) That year, my youngest sister, Megan, had this amazing teacher. She knew our family wasn't going to be having much at Christmas. So, she put us on every charity known to man.

We weren't aware of that until we get a knock on the door one day during Christmas break. My sisters and I were home alone but I wisely opened the door anyway.

A man was standing there with groceries and presents! So, of course I let him in. We were excited for the gifts but more importantly, there was food!

We arranged the presents around the tree.

An hour or so later. We get another knock on the door.

Uh huh. More gifts. More food.

When someone knocked the third time, the three of us looked at each other and the ever-growing mound of gifts under the Christmas tree. We were brilliant I tell you! We each grabbed some presents and hid them. We wouldn't want the next person to see how many we had and then take them to an actual needy family!

I think we ended up answering the door three or four times. Each with food and presents.

It was amazing. And even though at the time we weren't "church goin" folk, I knew. I knew He was providing. I knew He was letting us know He loved us.

His birthday, but He gave us the presents.

It was a great Christmas. "Icky House" and all.

A lil Tired

but that doesn't mean I won't answer the measly whole two questions I have left to answer.

My sister thought she'd outwit me and ask "why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle."

Pfft, I do have a husband you know. Who's smart. Good thing because I was about to google why it didn't stick to the inside. But Josh says it doesn't stick because it doesn't get air, so it can't dry.

Neener neener.

Then, Melissa decided to ask twice what my favorite high school memory was.

I can't think of just one. So, you get a few. Probably a lot.

One of my faves was my freshman year, I was in Home Ec. with 3 guys who cracked me up the entire semester. Matt, Aaron and Trace. I got in trouble everyday because of them. One day we had to cook. We were given a recipe and the exact amount of ingredients to use, basically, just follow the recipe and put 'er together. When we were done, we were to call the teacher over and she'd sample it. I was at a different cook station than the boys but could see them. Very early into the recipe, they messed up. And they didn't have extra ingredients. So, they started pilfering through the garbage can to see what the class before them had left. They used ingredients out of the garbage can!!! And when they were done they called her over to taste test their food. I was laughing hysterically. I couldn't control myself.
Wow, that was a long one. Maybe I'll post more of them later.

As a side note, we spent the weekend in Leavenworth with my friend Lindsey and her family. So beautiful there this time of year. I'll post a few pictures tomorrow.

Hope you all had a great weekend.

Da Answers to Yer Questions

Treena, my SIL, asked:

Why do you only like gifts in a box and not a bag?

Well, as much as surprises drive me nuts, I love them. And I feel like a gift in a bag means the surprise is over that much faster. If it's in a box and wrapped, you have to peel off the paper and then get the box open. And sometimes you have a warped parent who has duct taped your box closed, so it takes even longer to open. Not that I have one of those warped parents or anything...

Treena also asked:

What is your all time favorite treat?

Oh bugger, I dunno. That's so tough. I have such a sweet tooth, or 20. Your chocolate chip cookies are definitely up there on the list. But as a kid, my favorite treat was on Friday nights. We'd have tacos, with a Pepsi, and then after dinner my mom popped popcorn and we had M&M's. So, that was super special too. Man, I think I'm gonna have to think on this one awhile.

Kristie asked:

Did you pick a name for the baby?

In short, no.

In long, we have a couple names we're liking. I'll tell you what they are and if you all don't like 'em. Pffft. :)

For a boy, we like Scott. I have a friend named Scott and I've always loved the name. And it helps when you know someone with the name and you like them. I love the name Silas, too, but my husband went to school with a boy named Silas, and he had a ponytail and my husband now refuses to even consider the name.

For a girl, we like Sadie. If we'd not chosen Jaylee for our firstborn, she would've been Sadie. However, since Jaylee was born, another little girl in our family has been born and her name is Sabrie. So, we aren't real sure if we can do that. It's just too close I think. Next up, would be Esther. I love it. And it's growing on my husband.

We don't have middle names whatsoever, and we still have five months, so I'm sure this will all change!

Erica, my sister, asked:

What is your all-time favorite book?
Who are you most afraid of Meg or me?

All-time fave, huh? I'm thinking the Mark of Lion trilogy by Francine Rivers. These books increased my faith and Francine Rivers can paint pictures in your head. I loved them.

Who am I most afraid of? I really would like to say I'm not skerd of either one of you, seeing as how you are four years younger and Meg is six years younger. But it would be a lie. You both terrify me. And the image I can't get out of my head is the time you guys bloodied your knuckles on each other, just for funsies. So, I'd say it's pretty equal. I fear you both. You're both ruthless. And it all boils down to the fact that I'm a lover not a fighter.

Corie asked:

If you could spend a day with one person, who would it be and why?

My dad. Hands down. Why? Because my time with him was so short. I will always praise the Lord for the last year I spent with him. I was 19 when he died. And the last year he was alive, Josh would drop me off at my dad's house on his way to work and I'd work with my dad during the day. I didn't know him very well growing up, so it was really an awesome time for us. I'd really just like one more day. Just one.

You can keep 'em coming, I'll answer more if you have them. Thanks for giving me something to blog about today.

How About YOU do the Work, eh?

I've gots me a bits of Blogger's Block. I went on a blogging frenzy yesterday and used up so much amazing material that now I've not a blasted thing to blog about.

There's a blog I've started lurking (just like the many of you who lurk and don't leave comments, yes, I know you're there!) and saw that she (whom after I've lurked awhile, I'm sure I'll linky to her) had her amazing blogging readers and lurkers ask her questions because she, just like me, was having a bit of Blogger's Block.

So, to you, my faithful readers, who comment and lurkers who do not comment, now's your big ol' chance.

You may ask me a question. You may ask three questions, or maybe 11. It's your choice. I'll probably answer anything. Probably. You may ask your questions in the comments section (*gasp* some of you may have to come out of Lurkerdom!) and then at the end of this amazing day, hopefully I'll have something to blog about.

Christmas Questionnaire

Since I've only blogged twice today, why not another?! questionnaire

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? Wrapping Paper! I hate gift bags!

2. Real tree or Artificial? Real. You just can't beat that Freshly-Chopped-Tree-Smell.
3. When do you put up the tree? Usually 2nd weekend in December. I get claustrophobic if it's in my house too long.

4. When do you take the tree down? Christmas day after we open presents.

5. Do you like eggnog? Yeah, it's okay. Mixed with some Bailey's. :)

6. Favorite gift received as a child? New Kids on the Block everything. Pillow, sleeping bag, posters, cassette tapes. Oh how I loved them. Oh, and an engagement ring 9 years after that.

7. Do you have a nativity scene? Yeah, it's kinda cutesie though. I'd prefer a more adult looking one. You know, because I'm so mature and all.

8. Hardest person to buy for? Boys. My father-in-law, brothers-in-law. I just don't like buying for boys!

9. Easiest person to buy for? My sister Megan, she loves anything.

10. Mail or email Christmas cards? Mail. I actually did that this year! Yeah.Me!

11.Worst Christmas gift you ever received? Hmm...who reads this? lol, just kidding...Ohhh, the Christmas that Joshua bought me my engagement ring, he also bought me a couple of dresses. Horrid. Horrid. I tell you. I smiled. Thanked him and I think I actually wore them. Once.

12. Favorite Christmas Movie? Charlie Brown

13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? Day after Christmas. But the best shopping day of all is Black Friday.

14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? Those dresses I was just telling you about...

15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? Sugar cookies. Almond Roca. Banana bread.

16. Clear lights or colored on the tree? Colored, because that's what my husband likes.

17. Favorite Christmas song? Lil Drummer Boy and Silent Night.

18. Travel at Christmas or stay home? A little of both but luckily this year we get to stay home on Christmas Day!!!

19. Can you name all of Santa's reindeer? Yes, and did you know it's Donder and not Donner? I thought it was Donner. It's not. At least that's not how they say it on Ernest Saves Christmas.

20. Angel on the tree top or a star? Star.

21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning? One on Christmas Eve at my aunt's house. But I like what Michelle said, that they usually open one, like jammies on Christmas Eve. Think we might start doing that.

22. Most annoying thing about this time of year? The weather getting ugly and keeping people from getting into town.

23. What do you want for Christmas this year? Love Spell body wash and lotion from Victoria's Secret.

24. Favorite ornament theme or color? Not sure. I bought some tacky ornaments and I'm loving those, so I think my old wood ornaments are out for next year. Tacky it will be!

25. Favorite for Christmas dinner? Sugar Cookies. Almond Roca. Banana bread. :)

A Christmas Memory

The month of December stirs so many memories. I'll share a few.

This is my twelfth Christmas with my husband.

The first Christmas, I was 16 and we'd barely known each other over a month. He got me a stuffed bear and a tub of popcorn. I got him a wallet.

The second Christmas, I was 17 and we'd been dating just over a year. He got me an engagement ring, and I don't have a clue what I got him.

Our first Christmas as a married couple was strange for me. I was 18. Still so immature and used to the traditions my mom had instilled in me while growing up. I was used to getting a tree the first weekend of December (and watching my mom use a kitchen knife to trim it to fit in the stand) and I was used to a bunch of decorations and Christmas baking and Christmas songs and wrapping presents.

And there was none of that. And it was turning out to be the worst first married Christmas, ever! I may have shared before, so forgive me if I repeat myself, but we had no tree for the longest time. A few days before Christmas, we'd eaten dinner and I was fed up. I got up from the table and started to head out the door.

"Where you going?" He asks.

"I'ma gonna git me a tree!" I answered.

I was tired of waiting and in my stubborn mind I realized, "my mom didn't wait around for any man so she could get a Christmas tree, I don't need to either!"

Such a naughty frame of mind.

He went with me. And neither of us was happy. We got the lil thing home and I realized-we had no decorations. I wish I'd known more about making stuff on my own then, I could've made some ornaments. Instead, I bought a "first ornament" I also cut out a snowflake and I think my mom bought us an ornament too.

So...we had three ornaments that first year.

Each Christmas since has gotten better. I'm not nearly as stubborn and I'm enjoying the traditions that we've started as our own family. One being, we go up in the hills and cut down our own tree. This year, Josh took a day off and we left early in the morning, went sledding and then hunted the "perfect" tree.
Jaylee loved sledding and she loved playing in the snow.
But I think she liked eating it even more.
This isn't the tree we chose, but it's where Jaylee chose to take a rest and pose for a picture.

We got the tree home and Jaylee wanted nothing to do with decorating it. But she was excited to help put the star up.

And here she is, in here finished glory.


While I enjoy the memories and traditions my mom had for my sisters and me growing up, I take them and add to them, instead of having my mind set that things have to be the way they were when I was little. Feel free to share a Christmas tradition your family has.

19 weeks and 3 days

is not cute on me. Good thing my hair is!

Sorry I didn't post a picture last night. Jaylee got a fever and then started vomitting, that was fun.

I'm not a fan of this picture but really, who am I trying to impress?

Did I mention my husband moved the computer to our scary basement? That's why you see scary stuff all around me. At least it's warm in the basement.

Anyway, there are the matching hair and eyebrows. I'm rather enjoying it.

I Gots My Hair Did

My mother came over this morning to watch my child so I could go get my hair did. It was going to just be a cut but I decided to get 'er colored, too.

Husband asked what color.

"I'm going back to my natural color."

"Do we know what your natural color is?"

Since I had about 5" of roots, I thought she'd be able to work with that.

And she did. And now my hair matches my eyebrows. Amazing how that can be. It's been 13 years since they've done that!

Then I continued driving. I drove to a mall. All by myself. For hours! Did I mention I was all by myself? I was.

I was and I was lonely.

I passed the Cinnabon and a lady and her lil girl were sharing a milk and Cinnabon and I missed my lil girl (and I missed a Cinnabon, too).

But I pressed on. I finished my Christmas shopping. And I came home to a sweet girl I'd missed so much. It's so weird to me how I can miss her when I am with her 24! Hours! A! Day! EVERYDAY! But I did miss her.

And it was good to snuggle her when I got home.

And it's good to have eyebrows that match my hair.

Bugger, it's Monday

Usually I'm a fan of Mondays but today I'm tired. So, I'd like it to be Saturday. Then I could ask Josh to take care of Jaylee while I nap. Ooooh how nice that would be.

Friday night Amber and I went to my church's Ladies Dessert and Ornament Exchange. While there, I told a couple of the ladies I wanted a dad for Christmas. I've picked the perfect man for my mother. I tell them who he is and they agree. And he just happens to be at the church that night. Considered asking him first, "can you swim?" because really, that's important ya know?

But I didn't ask him that.

Instead I added to my most embarrassing moments list.

He was standing out by my car as we were leaving, so...I took a deep breath and said, "Mr. Jonas, do you date?"

His reply: "I'm married."

Thought about then asking, "So, that probably puts a damper on you marrying my mother?"

His wife doesn't come to church. I apologized, felt a bit sheepish, and told him I'd be praying for her.

I was really embarrassed. But mostly I'm sad. I really wanted him to be my dad for Christmas. I really wanted him to marry my mommy.

Guess I'll have to find another random man to ask if he dates. I just really had my heart set on that one.

For your enjoyment...

Amber made this for us. Us as in her and me but I'll say us as in you all and me.

She's on the left. I'm on the right. I can't stop watching it. Tears are streaming down my face. It's one of the funniest things I've ever seen.

Click here.

Jesus vs. Santa

*edited below*

Growing up my sisters and I believed in Santa Claus. We believed he came through the imaginary chimney of every apartment, house, duplex or fifth wheel we lived in. The smaller gifts under the tree were from our Mom but our main present said, "Love Santa" (in my mom's handwriting, just took me a few years to put that together).

I remember the day I found out Santa wasn't real. But even more, I remember the day my sister Erica found out he wasn't real.

Because I was the one who told her.

She was pestering me. Driving me nuts. The way younger sisters are supposed to I guess.

And I was a mean-spirited older sister. So, I told her. And she was crushed. Broke her heart. I actually felt bad for hurting her feelings. And I felt even worse when she sobbed to my mom about it and I got in trouble.

Growing up, Josh's family didn't do the whole Santa deal. Their emphasis was on Jesus. That Christmas was about Jesus. Growing up, we weren't part of a church, so I had no clue that was what Christmas was about.

When we got married we talked about what we'd have our children believe.

We didn't see eye-to-eye. He said our children wouldn't believe in Santa. I said they would. He told me that that's not what Christmas is about. I agreed but debated, "what harm is there in letting a child believe in something for a little while?"

He really had no answer.

It was a really good thing Jaylee wasn't born for seven years after that.

Before Jaylee was born, I was talking to my Aunt McKenna. She has a son a few years older than Jaylee and I remember talking to her about what her and my uncle were going to do for Landon at Christmas. Let him believe or not believe in Santa.

The response she gave me changed my heart toward allowing a child to believe in Santa Claus.

She told me they would not be talking about Santa at Christmas. She said that her and my uncle wanted Landon to trust them. How could they let him believe in Santa, whom he can see (on television, at Wal Mart, etc.) and also teach him about Jesus, whom he can't see, and then down the road, saaay when he's seven or eight, break the truth to him that Santa isn't real? First, he'd probably not understand being lied to and second, if they lied to him about Santa being real, who's to say that Jesus is real then?

Her point hit me. And I had to tell Josh he was right, it'd be best not to allow our children to believe in Santa.

I don't want to mislead Jaylee. I want her to trust me. And allowing her to believe in Santa, even for a few years, would be lying to her.

Jesus is the Reason for the Season.

*yes, I took Jaylee to get her pictures taken with Santa (not that it worked out). She was afraid. Asked who he was, so I told her he was a clown. A guy who dresses in silly clothes. She replies with, "oh." When she's older we'll discuss it further.*

Ever just wanna cuss?

Not me. Never me. I never use naughty words. At least not out loud...very often...

It's just been one of those days. One of those days where it's already bad and it's not even 9 a.m.!

I've done my dishes, well my dishwasher has done my dishes, I sent my Christmas cards out (then had a panic attack that people would think they are ugly) (I made my own this year) I got coffee for the husband that lately I'm adoring more than ever, I've bathed my child, cut her toenails and fingernails, cleaned out her ears, checked on her dog bite (which is almost non-existant now) I've gotten dressed (including a bra!), brushed my teeth and made banana bread.

I feel like I've accomplished alot in the 2 and a half hours I've been awake.

But it just feels like a bad day.

And I don't know why.

And I hate this feeling.

Okay, done venting now. At least for the moment.

Our Weekend

We had such a great weekend!

It started with Friday. Amber calls and tells me she'd like to watch Jaylee so Josh and I can go on a date. I'd really been wanting to do this but we don't have a babysitter and she's fun to have along, so we usually just take her. However, it had been one of those days that I just needed some time with my husband and once again, Amber pulls through! (Seriously not sure what I'd do without ya sometimes.)

We enjoyed dinner together and then went to my sister Megan's house and hung out there for a bit. They have an XBox 360 and Guitar Hero, which I've never heard of or played. But I got the chance and it was okay. I lack in the rhythm department and I think it's a crucial part of the game. And...I'll be honest, if I'm not the best at something right away, I don't want to play. I'm a brat like that. :)

Saturday we were up bright and early. Maybe not bright but it was early. 6:30 early. We had to park Josh's parents camp trailer downtown for the 19th Annual Sunnyside's Lighted Farm Implement Parade. It's very redneck but it's so fun!

After we parked the trailer, we SMT'd, then I took Josh to work and headed over for pictures with Santa at a local breakfast place. We joined Amber and her girls. Jaylee refused to go near Santa. She turned her head away from him. After that we drove across town for Sugar Cookie Decorating with Mrs. Claus. They provide the cookies and every possible cookie topper imaginable. Jaylee just ate it all. She downed icing, sprinkles, worms, marshmallows, milk, frosting and the list could go on. While busy "decorating" her cookie, Santa shows up behind her. She didn't know at first, kept "decorating", but then it was as if she smelled him (which is quite possible.) And the staredown began.

She didn't take her eyes off him. She leaned back and stared. He was making funny faces at her and she was immobile. Then, she started to tremble. He lost the staredown. Left. And she went back to eating sugar. I'll get a picture up soon for you to see. It really was hilarious.

After Joshua got off work we hooked an innertube to the 3-Wheeler and raced around the pasture. Jaylee got cold and went in for a nap and the neighbor kids came to entertain my husband. He drove them around the pasture for quite awhile.

Evening came and so did the parade! We took Amber's girls with us and the three girls sat on the sidewalk and watched in wonder as the floats and big rigs passed by with all their lights. They were so good and we all had a hoot.

Yep, that was our weekend. Simple but fun. Just the way we like it.

She's Moving!!!

Uh huh, I'm calling the baby a she. More importantly, she's moving. Today I'm really feeling her. Love it. It's fun. I'm actually pregnant and not just ill for funsies.

I'll post later about our hilarious weekend.