The Kitchen Table

After almost 11 years of marriage, we've replaced many of the items we first purchased as newlyweds. Mainly because I've been a discontented girl who wants something bigger, better, different!

Praise the Lord that He's working on me in this area.

One of the few things we still have is our kitchen table. 10 and a half years ago I loved her. She was simple and pretty and at that time, the chairs and base of the table were white. Then I went through an Americana phase (for like 7 years) and decided to paint the chairs blue and the table base maroon. And then sand 'er for a more rustic look.


My sister just gave us her "old" dining table and chairs. It's a beautiful set. We're blessed to have it. Since it doesn't fit in our kitchen, it's in our living room. Our old set is still in the kitchen and the other day I was sitting there.

The table was cleared off. I was alone at the table. And I just started looking at it.

After 10 years, the finish is wearing. The top is yellowing. The chairs are a little more rickety as they've been used to sit on, stand on, and used as saw horses for these last 10 years.

I sat there with my cup of coffee and was overwhelmed with memories of the 10 years I've had sitting at this table.

At age 18 I served my first Christmas Eve dinner on this table. A roast with lumpy gravy and lumpy mashed potatoes. There were three of us. My sweet husband Josh, myself and...my dad. Neither of them complained about the food. Looking back, knowing now that that was the last Christmas Eve I'd have with my dad, I wish I hadn't worried about the food and concerned myself more with showing my dad how glad I was to have him spending the evening with us.

So many meals at this table. So many hands held in prayer, in thanks to God for another meal He provided for us. This table has heard many days of laughter. So many days of tears.

Many evenings with family and friends playing cards, eating snacks. It's had a few drinks knocked over on it. Some pencils flying across it during games (where I'm losing.)

During the days when I didn't keep up my house, this table has been covered in papers, laundry or dirty dishes for days on end. Oh, who am I kidding? I still don't keep up with my house, so there are still days where paper and laundry pile up on 'er.

Many mornings and evenings spent discussing our goals, our plans, our dreams. This table has been here through our best times. Our worst times. The table where I laid my head down and cried...bawled when we got home from vacation after my dad died.

Our friends and family have come over and shared their hopes. Their dreams. Their fears and their tears.

We've listened and loved at this table.

I walked in many times to see our Beagle standing on the table. Sitting on the table. Laying on the table. Man, I miss that girl.

There was the day I came home and found blue papers on the table. Divorce papers. Papers that shook me. The table held them. I never wanted to. They were there for awhile. I chose to ignore them and ignore the fact that my life was spiraling downward. It took me quite some time but with the love and patience of an amazing man and the love and prayers of family and friends, I realized that being married to Josh was the best thing. Ever. Those divorce papers, they were shredded.

This is the table where our girls have sat to eat their first foods of Cheerios and Rice Cereal. They've pounded their chubby little fists on the table and I'm pretty sure there's just permanent greasy little prints where they sit.

Many pictures have been colored with crayons or markers thus marker stains have bled through onto the table. This used to be bother me. It doesn't anymore.

Each month for over 10 years I've sat here to pay bills, some months wondering where in the world will the money come from to pay these bills? and other months in awe that there's an abundance. The Lord...He provides. Always.

I've had scrapbook supplies piled oh so high on top of our table. Josh has had engine parts and grease all over our table.

Josh and I have spent many mornings sharing the silence while we read our Bibles and drink our coffee, him eating breakfast, me not. He always puts one foot on my chair and it drives me up the wall. Our new table makes this impossible for him to do. I'll probably miss it in some weird way.

She's no heirloom. No one will want it when we die. It's nothing special. But I've grown up with this table over the last 10 years and I'm deciding not to part with her.

Meeting Outside the Box

One of my favorite things about blogging is the friends I've made. My black box friends as I like to call them. I have more friends in this black box than I do outside of it. Seriously. This weekend one of my black box friends became an in real life friend.

For about a year now I've been reading Emily's blog. Her love for her family, the Lord and that quick wit sucked me in immediately. =)

Yesterday, I got to meet her. In person! Loved her, loved her husband and their children. I don't think I've ever met sweeter and more polite kiddos than theirs. I also thought it was pretty amazing that Jim would hold my baby. Very cool. No wonder she calls him Rockin' Jim.

We got to Seattle early and walked around a bit. We were headed back to our van when their rig turned the corner. I had no idea what they drove but just knew it would be them. They pass us and wave and Josh got a kick out of that. "Um, how did she know it was you?" Maybe because she's seen our picture a bajillion times on here?

Sweet new friends.
Wow, look how much taller she is than me!! (Just kidding, Emily...) My husband is going to love that he looks like he's the tallest in this picture. Funny that he's actually the shortest. (please ignore the fact that my baby has no socks on.)
Jaylee and her favorite treat. It was her first time having cotton candy (that I can remember) and she raved about how it was her favorite. Silly kid.
We toured the Science Center in Seattle, had some lunch and headed to REI to hang out out of the rain.
Jim and Emily's kids were so patient with Jaylee. She loves kids older than her and followed them all over. Within minutes of meeting them she says, "do you want to take my picture?"
Hello, annoying child. I'm reminding myself that she's three. This passes, right?

Josh loved getting to know Jim. I loved that he had a boy to talk to that he gets along with who has common interests. My husband is amazing but doesn't have many close friends. It was fun to see him getting along so well with another guy.

Six hours was not enough, cannot wait for camping in July!

First Hair Cut

At 3 and a half I decided maybe just maybe it was time to get this kid's hair trimmed. And of course you always need "coffee" before gettin' yer hair did.

Not 5 minutes after she sat to get her hair done did she spill the hot cocoa on her clothes and got it all over her face.

Kortnie was so great with her. I can't imagine it's easy to work with kiddos. I told her not to cut much off and if her curl fell out I'd kill her. =)

"Rolling" her hair. She kept asking "Kornie" why she was rolling her hair.


Nice chocolate face, kiddo.

The finished product!

I was getting my hair done at the same time. Barbie, the girl who does my hair took this pic for us. She was so patient with me. Letting me get up every once in awhile to go take Jaylee's pics.

Josh showed up to say hi for a bit and he took a few minutes to hop in the van with us to get his coffee.

We had a hoot. Today's been fun. I always love how my hair looks after Barbie has tamed it down. =)

Savoring these moments

A couple of months after I had Alison, I remember sitting on the couch, nursing her and thinking, "just 10 more months until I don't have to lift my shirt and nurse this baby." (i was a little cranky after Alison was born)

And then last night I thought, "only two more months until I'm done nursing."

It's mind boggling to me that almost a year has passed. Where has the time gone? I know it doesn't slow down or speed up but it sure feels like it's speeding up.

Since we had Jaylee I feel like I blink and bam! six months have gone by and I can't remember what the hey happened in that time.

My life is amazing. I love it. But am I enjoying each minute? Even though I feel like time is flying by, the days can be long and tiring and I find myself thinking, "if only they slept through the night and made their own lunch and bathed themselves and lived somewhere else..." Some days I kick myself for wishing away this time.

With the direction our lives are taking at this point, I'm thinking another baby is out of the question. I'm sad. Heartbroken. Because I've hurried Alison's baby-ness. Thinking I'll have more and it's no biggie to shove her into toddlerhood.

I'm deciding to savor my moments with these girls He's blessed me with. Even when I'm running on a few hours of interrupted sleep and making the 9 millionth PB sandwich and changing that stinky diaper, and answering that question I already answered. 12 times.

Soon enough, they'll be walking out my door to live their own lives.

And I want their memories of home to be filled with love and patience from their mama.

Maybe I shouldn't question her.

Conversation with the three year old this evening...

Her: "We can make popcorn."
Me: "No, we can't."
Her: "God said we can make popcorn."
Me: "No, He didn't."
Her: "Are you sure?"

Round about

Stuff swirling in my brain.

Wondering what is and isn't okay to post.

Thinking about upcoming events in our family.

Praying for a young (22) girl in our family who had a mammogram and now has to have a biopsy.

Realizing through my Esther bible study who the person is that I'm fixated on, who I have an unhealthy relationship with. Ugly. Just ugly.

Happy to be home today just doing stuff around the house.

Sad to have missed church due to this stinking cold. Bleh.

Thankful for a loving, patient husband.

3 drafts in process. To publish or not to publish...Need husband's opinion/approval.

Dreaming of flip flops like you can't believe! Thinking on payday it's time to do some online summer therapy shopping.

Thinking about how my grandma will be 70 on Saturday.

Thankful for Linda.

Laughing at my husband. He's so corny. But I love it. I pretend to hate it. But I love it.

Thankful that he's not a quick decision maker. He's praying. Praying. And praying some more. We need wisdom and direction.

Still wondering why the Lord would allow a father to be to die before meeting his child. Some things I know I'll never understand this side of heaven.

Amazed at the faith a member of my family has even though he's facing some serious medical junk. Again, I don't understand stuff sometimes.

I can see the mole under my chin. This means I've gained at least 5 lbs recently. Whenever I can see that mole I know I've gained weight. If I can't see it, then that means I only have one chin. Obviously I have more than one at the moment.

Thinking about the days my two sisters and I shared a room. The full sized bed Erica and I used to share. The twin bed with a plastic cover Megan used to sleep in. And the giggles that would erupt over the most ridiculous stuff. With my mom yelling to be quiet already. It's one of the rare times I remember actually liking and getting along with them. I'm sure now she loves knowing how much fun we had together in such close quarters.

Which reminds me of living in the fifth wheel for those few months when I was 12. A junky, run down fifth wheel. And our little family of four never had more fun. Weird to miss it...

Realizing I could live with my small family of four in a small environment and be happy.

Oh the things to come.

Dear Kentucky

To Whom the Person is that has been enjoying my archives,

Would you like a cup of coffee and some peanut butter bars while you're visiting? I hope you've been enjoying the ramblings of my life.

Sincerely,
Sarah

That Valentine's Banquet

Sorry I'm lame and haven't posted about it sooner. We had a hoot. The Newlywed Game was a kick. My sister Erica and her husband Derek (affectionately known as Derica) played also, along with 3 other couples. My sister and Derek were introduced first, then two couples between us. When it got to us to be introduced, we were introduced as, "This is Josh and Sarah, they're related." Long pause...roar of laughter. While everyone is laughing Pastor Tom continues that we're related to Erica and Derek. However, no one heard him because everyone was laughing so loudly.

We ended up being the winners of the game! Crazy huh?! It was a blast. We loved it.

Turning off the Time Wasters

So today which is actually last night because I'm writing it tonight but posting it for tomorrow, (just a minute, I'm out of breath with that sentence...)

whew.

Okay, so I'm not going to have any contact with the black box. Or answer my phone. Or anything.

My children and my house and my scrapbook (grrr) are going to have my time.

Bad Mom

Growing up all I ever ever ever wanted to be was a Mama.

I love my mother. And even though life growing up with her as my mother was nuts, I love how she raised me. You know, for the most part. =) She doesn't read my blog, no worries.

Raising my two sisters and me on her own...well, I can't imagine how difficult that must have been. I know I have my days where it can be 8 a.m. and I'm watching the clock until 5 p.m. wondering when my relief man will be walking in the door.

She didn't have that luxury.

Anyway.

For a girl who has only ever wanted to be a mama, I'm sure not very good at it. Today especially.

From about 8 this morning until about noon I was on the phone non-stop with one thing or another, trying to get stuff resolved with a couple of different things, talking to family about certain stuff that's coming up in our lives, etc. I was also on the phone and online with eBay customer support. I'm not sure I said or did anything nice with my girls in this time.

I do know that Jaylee completely destroyed my kitchen and living room in the process. I know that she begged to take a bath and I allowed her and that while unsupervised (you can call CPS now, I'll have her bags packed) she made the bathroom just as wet as she was. I shouldn't leave her unsupervised, since it hasn't been ruled out about drowning being hereditary...

She was horrible.

Alison was whiny. Clingy. Fussy. And did I mention whiny?

They were trying to get my attention. They just wanted a minute of my ever-lovin' time for crying in the dark.

I hate days like today. I hate days where I have failed as their mommy. All they want is for me to look at them, love on them, talk to them. And all I've done today is shoo them, shush them, and growl.

My house is a disaster. (Don't ask why I'm not cleaning it at the moment. I'm needing a breather.) We have a friend coming for dinner, so I know I should clean and maybe decide what I'm cooking.

I'm just bummed. I'm bummed that today my girls felt less important than every other thing that came at me. I'm mad at myself for not taking the time with them. ACK!

I love them with all that I am. They are my world. And by the way they've been treated today ya'd never know it. I hate failing. Especially in this area. I want to be the perfect mom. And I'm so not. I know we'll have good days and bad I just feel like I've been having more of the bad.

Something's gotta change.

Too Soon

When I got home from cleaning Linda's on Saturday afternoon, Josh informed me of a tragedy in our church.

One of our friends was in a skiing accident. He hit a tree and was killed.

His sweet wife is seven months pregnant with their first baby.

Please be praying for her and their family.

Love to Our Family and Friends

Little bit of this and that

Just a bit o' random stuff around our parts. Not our parts...but...well, where we live. Geesh.

1. Some conversation between the husband and I as we prepare for our thrilling event tonight:
me: "If they ask us the percentage of housework that each of us does, what are you going to put?"
(this was a question from last year)
him: "50/50"
me: raised eyebrows.
him: "that's not the right answer then?"

me: "if they ask us our favorite movie, what's mine?"
him: "Man on the Moon!"
me: "Did I drive 400 miles round trip to see Man on the Moon in theaters for its 20th anniversary?"
him: "oh. nope."

me: "so would yours be Princess Bride?"
him: "yeah, that or Gone in 60 Seconds...ooooh, OR Napoleon Dynamite. It's a classic."
me:
him: "let's go for Gone in 60 Seconds. Yeah, that one."

I'm sure we're going to just sail through this game! (so rolling my eyes)

2. Tomorrow I'm taking my mom out to Red Lobster for Valentine's Day. Next year I won't be her Valentine. I'll have a dad by then.

3. Oh, yes I will!

4. Every day at 3:42 pm a little neighbor boy and girl get off the school bus. He'll proceed to hand her his backpack, pull down his little bitty pants and pee as he walks up the driveway.

Every day. I kid you not.

5. My baby had her 9 month check up today and I got lectured for the bajillionth time about vaccinations. I'm so over going to the doctor.

6. My fat pants were a bit tight this morning. Pffft.

7. My neighbor is a teacher. I don't think she's been at school a full week all year. I want her job. Last week some of her six children were sick. They were outside playing in shorts, t-shirts and no shoes or socks. It was in the 20's. M'kay...

8. My husband is planning to get me something for Valentine's Day. I don't know what it is. This is a first. I always...always guess my gifts from him. I haven't asked because I'm scared to know. I bought him a card. And had a baby 9 months ago, that's gift enough, no?

9. This is my favorite post of the week.

10. My Esther bible study at the Naz on Tuesdays is kicking my butt. I love it. This week I've had to face some amazing fears. I'm actually overcoming some of them. Proof? I let Amber drive on our date last night. Anyone who knows me, knows that's huge. I don't like being a passenger. I have issues. So, yay! I'm getting better!

11. I took cupcakes in to Oxarc this morning for Josh's co-workers. As I walked out the door I said, "Merry Christmas." I always say that. I meant to. But I think the new guy was wondering if I was a weirdo...if he only knew, right?

12. The sun is out for the first time in ages. I was stoked. Until I pull my sunglasses out and find that they are broken beyond my husband's repair. Bugger. (the man can fix pert near everything)

13. I have reservations to go camping 5 months and 4 days from now. I've already started a list of things we'll be taking. Um, I might be a bit excited.

14. My back hurts. I'm sick of my back hurting. The doctor gave me a shot of some B12 awhile ago and it made it feel so much better. So, he sent me home with some syringes and B12 to give to myself...it's not working. (Josh almost passed out watching me shoot myself.)

15. I got out my scrapbook stuff to make Valentine cards for all (2) of my friends. Then remembered why I consider burning all that stuff. I suck.

16. My kids are so tired and totally fighting their naps right now. They are talking and laughing in there and I know that should make me happy but I just want them to sleep already!

17. I need to update my Podunk blog. Bleh.

There you have it. The randomness that is my life. As for #4...do all boys do this?! I mean, I know in the summer my husband always pees outside (he'll love finding out I told you this) but he never just pees up and down the driveway. At least not that I'm aware of....

We'll be kicked outta church for these

Oh, Lord. Ever since Josh found out we've been chosen for the Newlywed Game and that we're supposed to bring a wedding picture, he's been conjuring up ideas for our wedding photo.

Yes, we have one of our sweet little selves from 10 years 7 months ago (exactly!) but we've decided to spice it up a bit. I mean, what's a church function without a little spice, right?

So, you're getting a sneak peek. Shhh. Don't call our pastor.

So, there we have it. Our normalness for all to see. My MIL brought her wedding dress over and had I seen this thing 10 yrs ago, I would have worn it. I love it. She made it 39 years ago for $20. It's gorgeous. And it fit my pillow quite nicely! =) My FIL brought his shotgun, Josh had me draw a tattoo on him and I put on as much make up as I possibly could. I'm going to have the last one printed and framed for Friday night.

But I'll also take this one too.

A Wild Hair

No, not a nose hair or ear hair or...

Just some crazy ideas that I'm thinkin' sound pretty fun. I have a ton of them that run through my mind on a daily basis.

Here's a list of wild hairs I have:

1. Go see/meet Emily.

2. Go see/meet Gayle.
(thinking I can bust numbers 1 and 2 out in one trip.)

3. Chop off my hair and dye it.
(husband won't go for it.)

4. Drive across the country.
(checking account won't go for it.)

5. Throw away all but two pairs of shoes.
(seriously, I'm considering this.)

6. Take an entire week where I do not at all do any housework, just scrapbook to my heart's content.
(won't happen but it sounds fun!)

7. Go to Safeway, purchase Peanut Butter Cup ice cream, some Jalapeno Poppers, some Dr. Pepper and maybe a rotisserie chicken and eat myself into oblivion.
(I am taking this into SERIOUS consideration, folks. Serious.)

8. Buying my husband a gun for Valentine's Day.
(Yep, I am. That's what he wants. I may just do it!)

9. Get rid of the televsion. Once and For ALL!!
(we don't watch it, what's the point of having it?)(besides it being a convenient babysitter during cartoons?)

10. Sign up and sell Scentsy.
(I've had a party, it was awesome, and I continue to sell it...for other people. So, why not do it myself?!)

Numbers 1 and 2 are must haves for me. Must.have.

like pronto.

Number 3 won't happen til I lose me some toddler weight.

Number 7 may just happen tonight.

Number 8 isn't likely this paycheck.

Number 10 happened about an hour ago!

So, I did it. I signed myself up to sell Scentsy. I love the stuff, I really do. If you've never heard of it, here's a bit o' info. In their words...

A secret combination of ingredients is used to create a pool of melted wax, which is transformed into a wickless candle bar. Only the finest scented oils are hand-picked to give an array of aromas. The melted wax is poured into reusable containers for easy storage.

In my words: There's a bar of wax (over 80 to choose from,) you place it on top of your warmer (dozens to choose from) turn it on, the lightbulb heats and melts the wax. The wax fills your home with an awesome scent of your choice and you don't have to worry about flames, soot, wicks that burn the candle unevenly...and you don't have to worry about your kids, pets, or ahem...husbands burning themselves on the wax, should they happen to get into it. The wax does not get hot.

To sum it up in two words- Scentsy Rocks.

I'm pretty official. I have my own website. Well, at least for the first three months...since it's free! =) Check it out, let me know whatcha think.

Sarah's AwesomeShmawesome New Website

He's Calling in Sick

Our church does an annual Valentine's banquet dealie-o. We don't go. I don't know why, we just haven't gone.

Last year I guess they did this Newlywed Game that was a total riot. Rather, my aunt and uncle were the riot. I believe they ended up winning the game. Rumor has it anyway...not that there are rumors in the church...

Anywho.

Last week I get a call from our associate pastor, Tom. It's always a little scary to me to get a call from the pastor. Not sure why. I think it reminds me of school days and the principal and all of that. Not that I ever had to go see the principal...for skipping class...

Um, again, anywho...

Tom calls to ask if Josh and I would like to be among the couples to play in this year's Newlywed Game. I chuckled.

Then agreed.

I told Josh we were going to the banquet and that we were playing this game. He was fine with it until:

Sunday, our pastor was up front making announcements and was talking about this Friday and the dinner banquet and asked who the particpants were for the Newlywed Game. I didn't say anything. Didn't need to, as Tom's wife Pia, who was sitting in front of us, let everyone know we were part of the game.

Josh leans over and whispers, "you mean, not everyone going to the dinner is playing?"

I shook my head.

And I'm wondering if we were chosen, in part, to play this game because I posted this picture of us on Facebook and Pia saw it and thought we'd be a good laugh for those at the banquet...



We're supposed to bring a wedding picture. More on that later this week...

Hello, name is Procrastinating Queen

If there were only one thing I could change about myself, it would be this.

I wish I did not procrastinate!!!

I have an entire list of bad qualities. But I think this tops my list. I will do anything to not doing something right now. Did that make sense to anyone else but me?

Right now my Esther bible study is sitting on my dining room table. I cannot tell you how much I am learning and loving this study. It's been so freeing! I never realized before the tactics that Satan can use in our heads! Bleh!

Anyway...so I meet at the church with a bunch of wonderful women on Tuesdays (that's what today is, right?!) and then we have seven days to complete five lessons. Seven days to complete five lessons. So, if I started my lessons on Wednesday, I'd have plenty of time to finish only five lessons right? You know, since I have seven days to do FIVE lessons.

Um, so who has only done one lesson?

Yesterday.

Thinking I should prolly get off here and go do my lessons. And get dressed and brush my teeth. Do my hair, put on some make-up. Bathe my kid. Do her hair. Get her dressed. Nurse the baby. Bathe the baby. Dress the baby. Strap 'em into their seats.

And get some coffee.

Today is going to be glorious. And I'm not going to procrastinate. Until tomorrow.

We didn't leave home without it

Oh my word.

Last night we had a first for our family. One I'm not proud of. One I pray to God, never happens again.

We went out to dinner with Caleb and Denise (my B&SIL) and while we're there, Alison starts pitching a royal fit.

I tell Josh to give her the pacifer. It's a cure-all, dontchaknow? But he can't find it. I can't find it. He walks through the restaurant, goes outside and traces the steps back to our van, it's nowhere.

NO WHERE!

So, we get our food. Josh is holding Alison, trying to get her to calm down. People are starting to stare and I've now become the mom that honestly, I've talked badly about. I have seen people with those horrendous children and been like, "lady, why can you NOT control that kid of yours?!"

Of course I've never had the balls to say that, but I've thought it. (yes, I just said balls) Considered hitting backspace.

Changed my mind.

Anyway, Josh leaves the restaurant. His food arrives shortly after.

Caleb eats his dinner. And then he relieves Josh of his brat holding duties. Do I have the coolest brother in law ever, or what? Love ya, Caleb. Josh comes in to eat, then I took my turn with the beast when I was done eating.

I come back in with her after I know everyone is done. We have our checks, it's time to go, and my three year old niece says she's found something.

Uh huh. The pacifier.

Grrrr.

Things that make me a happy happy girl

By nature, I'm a pretty pessimisstic chick. I mean, not always. Okay, always. But if you lived where I lived you wouldn't be all happy go lucky all da time.

And yesterday as I was driving through this town that I loathe, I had to start praising the Lord for good stuff so that I wouldn't ram the vehicle in front of me that was doing 17 in a 35.

(Hellooooo, Border Patrol!!! Over here!!!!)

Anywho...

So, here's a list of stuff that makes me happy.

• a full tank of gas
• my baby crinkling her nose
• my baby sleeping through the night for two nights IN A ROW!! Praise the Lord!
• sunshine
• Coffee
• friends
• Facebook
• Esther bible study, man I'm learning A LOT from this
• forgiveness
• Coffee
• my new camera, she doesn't have a name yet and that's so not like me.
• emails from friends
• my husband taking the girls for a couple hours so I could rest
• my 3 yo praying over me when I wasn't feeling well
• late night chats on FB with Denise
• Coffee
• a full pantry
• a new razor
• heated leather seats, greatest invention ever, Lord bless that person
• an empty laundry basket!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
• have I mentioned coffee yet?
• plans for Valentine's Day

Short list. But it's amazing how focusing on stuff that makes you happy really can turn your mood around.

What's yer list?

Some Bloggy Lovin'

In the last coupla days I've received two awards. TWO! AWARDS!

Smokes.

The last time I won an award was in High School. And I'm not sure "Most Likely to be seen on Jerry Springer" really counts as an award...but a girl's gotta be known for something I suppose.

Liz gave me this:

"These blogs are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these writers."

I had to ask Webster what "aggrandizement" meant. He said it's about seeking power. Nice to know that I'm not considered one who seeks this! Thank you, Liz. I do aim to find friends and to be a friend. I was just talking with one of my greatest friends tonight about how it's sad that we don't really have more of them. Being a girl is tough. And for some reason, it's tough for girls to have and be friends. (More on this another time.)

And so, I pass this award on to my friend, Emily. I haven't met her in real life, yet. We're still separated by this black box. But after reading her blog for the last year, I can say, that fer shizzle, we'll be great friends. She's wonderful and definitely deserving of an award about a girl who aims to be a friend. Love you, Emily!

Just this evening I received a message alerting me that I'd been given another award! It must be because tomorrow is 4 months until my birthday and I'm receiving gifts for being 28 and 3/4!

Linda made her own awards to give out and I got this one!!!
Wow. I don't even know what to say. Me, without words?! I know!

Saying it like it is, is definitely how I hope to roll. I don't want to be someone who beats around the bush. Just beat the bush, already! I want to know where I stand with someone. Mainly, I'm that way 'cause I'm a lil slow. =) I need things to be black and white so that I get it. I'm not good at reading between lines. I always want to have honesty in every relationship I have. Including you guys, here.

Thank you, Linda. I'm honored. Truly.

So, I pass this awesome award on to two tell-it-like-it-is girls. Two girls who tell it like it is in different ways.

Gayle, married with children. Telling it like it is as a wife and mama. The good days, the not so good days. She's real and I love it. Love her. Can't wait to hang out someday.

Amy Beth, single girl, running an amazing ministry for young girls. Telling it like it is last week in the life of a single girl committed to purity. Her posts last week, I'll be printing off to read, verbatim to my girls when they are old enough. If you have teens, pre-teens, toddlers, read up! Heck, if you're a girl, read Amy Beth's blog.

Thank you Liz and Linda. I'm totally stoked to have received awards from you girlies. And stoked to pass them on to three deserving chicks.

My Thoughts on the Super Bowl

The Cardinals were robbed. It was a total flashback of three years ago when the Seahawks played the Steelers.

Ridiculous.

I'm done now.

This Girl I Love

You are three and a half. So far, you are unaware of the half part. Oh, just you wait. I'm sure next year you'll know to add the half.

You are beautiful. Inside and out. Your eyes shine when you laugh. You have an extra special giggle for your daddy. You are patient with your little sister. You get a spanking every single night for getting in her crib. But it doesn't stop you.

You love milk and Eggo waffles. You love to go to the grocery store to get a piece of bubble gum. You learned to write the letter "A" yesterday. We both cried. Not tears of joy. Tears of frustration. Lord, help us!

You love to go. Doesn't matter where, you just love it. You always have.

You love to be outside. You lay on Shadow as if he were a pillow. He doesn't care. You help me put dishes away and laundry too.

I love the way your little nose turns up. Your lips are always perfectly pink and chapped, too.

I think you'll go to college sucking your thumb.

Your curly hair makes me insane. I know I only have myself to blame. Well, and my dad, too. Yeah, let's blame him.

Bath time lasts approximately 1 hour. Daily.

You have no idea that a toy always comes in a Happy Meal. You get surprised if there is one. I love that. I also love that I just happen to have a random toy in my purse to give you on random occasions.

Last night while brushing your teeth you yelled, "Will Dr. Jon be proud of me?!"

I'm sure he will!

When your daddy comes home from work you squeal as if it's been weeks since you've seen him.

Every time.

He loves it.

I love you, sweet girl.

Promise Kept

*shiver*

I said yesterday that my laundry pile was stacked half way to the ceiling. I wasn't joking.

I also said I'd post a picture of it.

Again, wasn't joking. Oh, how you wish I were.

Head over here and take a look-see. But make sure any judgemental bone in your body is gone before ya do.

Everything you never wanted to know

On Facebook this tag is going around of 25 things about me. After posting it I realized I had so many more (35 more to be exact) to share! Lucky you, here they are!

1. I get nervous to do these things, worrying that people will judge my weirdness.

2. I love to check the mail. It's one of my favorite things to do during the day.

3. I love road trips. Don't care where to, just love 'em.

4. A perfect date to me is going for coffee, holding hands, and window shopping.

5. I want a Dad for Christmas this year. I'll keep asking til I get one.

6. My favorite food is Mexican. I could eat Steak Mexicano everyday and not get tired of it.

7. I have a thing for numbers. I memorize them. Add them. Love them.

8. I don't like watching a movie more than once. Unless it's Dirty Dancing.

9. I have a terrible voice but I love to sing. LOVE TO SING.

10. I would love to learn how to play guitar.

11. My red KitchenAid mixer and my camera are two things I wouldn't want to be without.

12. I'm horrible at switching the laundry from washer to dryer.

13. I love to cook. I want to be better at it.

14. I love having company over.

15. I don't get enough alone time with my husband but when we go out, I feel guilty for leaving our kids.

16. I love to clean toilets but hate washing dishes. HATE DISHES.

17. I vacuum 5 times a week.

18. At age 28 I finally got to see New Kids on the Block in concert. It was one of the greatest moments of my life.

19. If it were warm 365 days a year, I'd only own flip flops.

20. I got appendicitis at age 26, while removing my appendix, the doctor found a malignant tumor. A week later I had another surgery. I now have a six inch scar on my belly. Having half of my colon removed did not remove the 20 lbs excess weight I'm carrying.

21. I don't eat breakfast.

22. I love chocolate and peanut butter anything. Yum.

23. Venti Iced Hazelnut Breves are my weakness.

24. I will, on occasion, snort when I laugh.

25. My back always hurts.

26. I don't mind sharing a glass of water or a can of pop but I refuse, absolutely will NOT share a glass of milk.

27. I picked out my firstborn daughter's name while I was still in high school before Josh and I were even engaged, while he and I were "on a break."

28. We don't watch TV.

29. I love to iron.

30. I never called my dad, "Dad" and I'll forever regret that.

31. Josh's laugh is one of my favoritest sounds.

32. I chew my fingernails and I hate it.

33. I peed my pants in Shop-Ko when I was 9.

34. I didn't have any pain meds having my kids. If I have another, I think I deserve meds next time.

35. I'm scared to death of heights.

36. I hope drowning isn't hereditary.

37. When I write out a grocery list, I write the rough draft, another copy, and then the final copy that is in order of the layout of the grocery store.

38. My laundry is piled half way to the ceiling as I type this. I'm not kidding. I'll post a picture tomorrow.

39. I love my birthday and think it should be declared a national holiday.

40. I chew on ice while I'm pregnant.

41. I love paper towels.

42. When my tax return comes, I'll be able to pay off our VISA. I'm ecstatic.

43. I once watched television at the fire station in town, while sitting on the fire engine and all the guys were sitting inside the station. It was a hoot.

44. My first job was a paper route.

45. I'm left-handed.

46. I used to write poems in high school.

47. My cousin and I used to put dog food in black olives at holiday gatherings.

48. My favorite color is red.

49. I'd rather pee in an outhouse than a public restroom.

50. Shopping at thrift stores is more exhilerating to me than a mall.

51. I still doodle "Sarah loves Josh" on random pieces of paper, the phone book, grocery lists, etc.

52. I can't sit at the table while someone else is eating cereal. *shiver*

53. I love the smell of Pine-Sol.

54. I went to Mexico one year for a mission trip as a sponsor. We were sent back into the States for something (can't remember) and didn't get back into Mexico before the border closed. We slept at a Denny's I believe. We had no contact with our youth group and my mom was sure I was dead.

55. I knew the moment I saw my husband that I would marry him. I was 16.

56. 2 years later, we were married.

57. My sister-in-law once took the day off of work to spend the day with me, it's still one of my favorite memories of being with her.

58. If I ever have a son I want to name him Scott.

59. My husband weighs less than I do.

60. I love him anyway.

Okay, I'm off to bed.

The New Kids on the Block photos you have been DYING to see

Okay, maybe you haven't been dying to see them. But I completely forgot Amber emailed them to me.

So, in case you missed the memo: Amber and I were in love with NKOTB when we were 10-12ish. Both of us between 10-12ish, kinda poorish. We weren't cool enough to see them in concert then but oh we were cool enough to see them 18 years later!

There are no pictures of Jordan, Joey, Donnie, Danny or Jon because they were taking the pictures of us. Go figure.

We were stoked, can you tell?!
Asked a random girl to take our picture.

What's a trip to Seattle without stopping at Goodwill?! Too bad this fur was like $45, I totally would have bought it...

I refrained from posting the picture of me hooked up to the pump. Seriously, Amber took one. It's not easy being away from your 6 month old baby when you're nursing. Oh, the things we do for our children... Josh put an inverter in my van with jumper cables and showed me how to hook up the inverter to the battery and plug my pump in (what would I do without this man!?) So, we got to the concert a lil early, 'cause that's how we roll and we parked so I could pump. The hood was up on my van, jumper cables hooked up to the battery and me sitting in the back seat of the van, with pump cables hooked up to, um, me. It was quite a sight, obviously, since Amber thought it picture worthy. At one point she had to get out and deter a friendly fellow who was concerned we were having car troubles. Wouldn't he have been in for a shock?

In 2007 we saw Dirty Dancing on the big screen in Seattle, 2008 was NKOTB. The last two years have been unreal. My childhood dreams, coming true. 2009 must hold something truly amazing.

I'm thinking it's a dad.

I love it when he talks dirty

My husband.

Oh, that man.

He already rocks my world by being the hottest guy ever. You know, besides Jordan Knight of New Kids on the Block. =)

On Sundays after church we almost always go to Costco for lunch. It's a cheap lunch of $3.77 and I get my time in of people watching. I love to watch the people pass us with their huge carts of goods. I love seeing what other people buy. I'm always so envious to see people load up their carts. How fun that would be! My favorites are the flat bed carts. The orange ones. The carts that have no limits. Josh knows this is a dream of mine.

To one day go into Costco for something other than a hot dog and piece of pizza for lunch.

On Friday night he tells me...

"When I get my next paycheck, I want you to go to Costco and buy whatever you want or need from there. I want you to get one of those big carts that you like."

Be still my heart.

The man never looked sexier than in that moment.

He's pretty much my favorite being at the moment. I can't wait til Friday.

If you were going to Costco and could buy anything, what would it be? I need some ideas.

So, maybe I panicked just a lil. Okay, a lot.

Whew.

Anyone else feeling the TGIF with me?

Yesterday was one of the craziest days of my entire life. I kid you not.

The day started off amazing. Amber showed up unexpectedly with a coffee for me! And then Janie showed up with a couple of pounds of hamburger and some rib steak for us! I have amazing friends!

But then they left. And I made lunch for Sugar. And set Spice in her chair with some pieces of bread. I called my sister in law, because helloooo, it'd been since last Friday that we chatted. That's not normal!

I'm on the phone with Treena when I hear a loud crash.

I hung up on her.

On the floor of the kitchen was Spice, still in her chair, face down. It wasn't secured to the kitchen chair and Sugar was trying to pull her closer to her when she pulled it down.

This is the part where I tell you that yes, I'm aware that not securing the booster to the chair is a bad thing. It's not like I did it on purpose. I'm beating myself up enough, I don't really wanna have anyone else do it for me. =)

So, I get her out of the chair and there is blood all over. Blood doesn't bother me until it's coming out of my baby. It was all over her face so I wasn't sure where it was coming from. She started to cry really hard and then her eyes rolled into the back of her head and she went completely limp in my arms.

Honestly, I thought she had died in my arms. I freaked. I called 911. Sugar started praying. The 911 operator told me to lay Spice on her side and keep her real still. I was begging the Lord to just let her be okay, please.

Spice woke back up. The ambulance showed up. They said what had probably happened was that she cried so hard she passed out from it. They checked her over, said she looked great but that they recommended I drive her to the ER just to be sure.



We did. And they wanted to do a CT scan since she passed out. Poor little baby. She did so amazing. Three hours in the hospital, much of that was waiting time, when they finally came in to give me good results of my little girl's brain, what the doctor found was Sugar napping on the hospital bed and Spice and me in the chair. Asleep.

It was a rough day. Tiring day. I was glad to get home.

She's fine. She has a cold so she hasn't been feeling so hot as it is, but she's up and moving, getting into stuff and being the sweet/naughty lil girl that I love.

Seriously, who does this kid think she is?

The mailman showed up a little earlier today than he usually does.

I tell Jaylee that I'm going to go check the mail.

I'm half way down the driveway (which is a ways) when she comes running out, wearing her Cars helmet and knee pads, yelling frantically.

"Mooooom, you need to button my pants for meeeeee, pleaaaaaase!"

Did she really think I'd just turn myself back around and button her drawers for her and then go back down the driveway again!?

Hellooo, I've worked hard to get this chubby, like I'm going to make an extra trip just so I can button 'er up.

Project 365

I started another blog.

Since I'm sooo good at keeping up with this one.

And since I was amazing with the diet blog. Yeah, I'm rolling my eyes, too.

It's a blog with pictures.

Mostly pictures.

Some words, too.

It's mostly my accountability partner for Project 365 but other pics as well.

Check 'er out!

Creative Juices

have run dry. I've got nothin' for ya.

Nuttin.

Not that any of my other posts are creative but at least I have something to talk about. Not so much today.

I watched the Inauguration.

That was the most exciting thing I did.

While I didn't vote for Barak Obama, it was cool to watch history in the making. That's the only part I liked.

No, I also liked his daughters, they're cute.

I wish I were as stylish as they are.

Crazy Train

It's quiet in my home. Children are napping. Husband is at work. Dog is twitching with crazy dreams.

It's peaceful. Today, unlike the three previous days I've had, I feel like I can breathe.

Friday was a bit of a pity party. I'm amazing at throwing that kind of bash. Let me know if you'd like to be invited some time but really there's only room for me.

Saturday was my frazzled day. Josh is still talking about it. I'm still wondering about it. And I'm sure our guests that visited are curious as well.

I went to clean Phil and Linda's and I'm not real sure why but I was never really able to get myself together that morning. I'm not sure if it's that I've stopped drinking my normal dose of coffee or what. But I left Linda's with the intent to head to Safeway. I couldn't for the life of me figure out how I was supposed to get there. It was the weirdest thing. I did end up getting there but I'm pretty sure I took the longest way there possible. And once at the grocery store, I didn't know what I was getting there. I went home with a pizza and a chicken.

And then there was yesterday. Sundays are pretty crazy anyway and yesterday was no different. This month it's our turn to work in the nursery. 6 babies ranging from 4 months-8 months was a little crazy. Because if one cries the others chime in as well.

Lack of sleep has been a bit of an issue. I know I could be sleeping now but I don't sleep well during the day.

Four things that rocked my world in the last three days though...

A phone call from my sister, Megan on Friday.
A magazine subscription from my SIL, Treena on Saturday.
Time spent with Trevor and Megan last night.
A visit from Amber this morning.

The Lord knows just who and what I need. I'm blessed. A lil scatterbrained but blessed.

Warning: Collect Calls will Drain your Life Savings or Take your Firstborn

hmm...the latter might not be so bad...

A few weeks ago I did a dealer trade for a local car dealership. This is where I pick up a rig from them and drive it to another dealership, drop it off, and then return with another. Have I told you I do this?

I've only done it twice and I love it. I get to take my kids. I get paid. And I love to drive.

The downfall is that I don't have a cell phone and that proves interesting at times.

This last time being one of those times.

I had to call Josh while I was in The Dalles to tell him I was going to be late and that Jaylee had just puked in a 2009 Dodge Journey that only had 21 miles on it when I got in it.

Oh.Boy.

My calling card was out of the question since it had expired, so I had to call collect.

I got my bill for that collect call yesterday.

$44.97

Yes, you read correctly.

My 6 minute call to Josh cost me a week of groceries. For real.

I called and tried to get out of it.

I didn't succeed.

I will never make a collect call again. Lesson learned.

The hard way.

Oh, Summer, the things I do for you

In hopes of warmer weather I did the unthinkable.

I thought that maybe just maybe if I...

I kept thinking, "if I do this, surely summer will come. Surely I'll be able to sport a pair of shorts and some flips."

But no.

I was wrong.

My winter legs are gone. I'm having to keep warm by bundling up. My winter legs kept me toasty. Itchy but toasty.

I shaved my legs for you, Summer and still you are not here.

Sigh...

Comfort Zone Shmomfort Zone

They are so overrated.

I pulled on the same ol' clothes to head to bible study this morning. Deciding, "who gives a rip?" Well, besides me of course...

The bible study isn't at my church. It's at the church I used to go to. I was nervous because it's been awhile since I've been there and there are many new people that I wouldn't know. It was so nice to walk in and have people be excited to see me. Thank you, Debby! Thank you, Nora! The mamas of two of my best friends love on me as if I were their own. It warmed my heart and my nervousness subsided.

I got to the church early, naturally. That's how I roll. And when free childcare is involved well that's how I roll even more so! =)

The study is on Esther and it's by Beth Moore. This is my first Beth Moore study and I'm pretty stoked.

We broke off into groups and my group is full of postpartum women and a handful of women that have grandchildren already. Our group leader wanted us to go around the room saying why we were excited to be there. These women are wonderful. Some want to go for the accountability, some to learn about Esther, and then it gets to me.

Why am I excited?

"I'm looking forward to the 2 hours of childcare."

Yeah, I said it.

Outloud even.

This isn't pretty, I'd leave now.

You've been warned.

I'm going to a bible study today. I was looking forward to it. Until this morning. Until right now. Until I realized...yeah, I don't have anything to wear. It may sound silly but I don't.

And I have no one to blame but myself. And that's no fun. Life is sooo much easier when we can blame someone else.

If I were thin, I'd have two tubs full of clothes I could be wearing. Cute. Fun. Girly clothes. Instead, I have frumpy hide my fat clothes that aren't really doing their job. I don't want to go out in public. I want to stay here and load up on bon bons.

But I'll go.

Frump and all.

Pictures for Phil

Some random art in Lake Oswego. My husband isn't normally a fan of me touching behinds unless it's his behind, but this time he didn't care. Especially since I was too short to actually touch it and because it wasn't a real person, in case the headlessness wasn't a clue... Alison and me, my SIL, niece and Jaylee.

We ate at PF Chang's for the first time this weekend. De-lish! This was our dessert glass that had chocolate cake in it. Had...it took me all of 2.5 seconds to clean that puppy out!

Our little family in front of PF Chang's.

There ya go, Phil. =)

His Eyes

I watched a basketball game this weekend where third and fourth grade girls were teammates.

There was one girl who caught my attention. A girl who touched my heart. A girl who clearly did not fit in.

She didn't have the same stylish shorts the other girls wore. She didn't have the same name brand shoes, either.

Her hair was disheveled. Her face held no expression. She was there. She just wasn't there.

Toward the end of the game, standing just outside the gym doors was another young girl, identical to the girl on the court. Same hair, just a bit lighter, younger, with more expression. Probably because she'd yet to feel the hurt her older sister had. Growing up sometimes sucks. Next to her, I could see another little girl. Finally, the mother brings all her children into the gym. She's carrying a little boy and two girls trail her, one pushing a stroller with another child inside.

Five children.

Before I even see the girl's family, while she's on the court, I remember third and fourth grade. I hated third and fourth grade.

Hated.

If you aren't the girl who has the right clothes, shoes, backpack, etc. you don't fit in.

Then, when Mama walked in with four more children, it was obvious she didn't fit in. Five kids.

Five.

I'm sure every eye was on this mama while she walked in front of everyone to get to her spot in the gym. Each mind wondering, why, if she can't afford to buy them the latest trends, would she continue to have more? They passed in front of us quickly. But they were on my mind, my heart all day. Still. Part of it is because I wonder if that's how people viewed my single mom raising my two younger sisters and me. Did people wonder why she continued to have kids if she could barely support us? Did people pity us? Did people snub us? Did they roll their eyes?

Yes.

But they also didn't know my mom's situation.

I don't know that mama's situation.

But He does. He knows her situation. He loves that mama and her five babies. He sees them and loves them, adores them. He doesn't care about their clothing, their shoes, He cares about their hearts. He cares about what people think of them because they are His. He doesn't look at that mama and sigh or roll His eyes.

I didn't talk to her after the game. I wanted to. But didn't. I wanted to encourage her. Bringing four young kids into a small gym takes some...stuff. Big stuff. Just taking my two kiddos out and about is tiring at times. I wanted to tell her I thought she was strong. Again, I didn't. It's sad how easy it is for me to wonder what other people will think of me talking to a stranger. I'm embarrassed of myself. Ashamed.

I want to see people the way He sees. Whether rich or poor. I want to love as He loves. And that requires getting out of my comfort zone.

To grow, I need to be out of my comfort zone. To be like Jesus, to see like Jesus, I need to be more into Jesus.

Rule Breaker

I'm here! I'm here!

Oh, you didn't notice I've been gone?! pffft.

I've been tagged. Which is fun. But I'm not going to tag anyone specifically. I'm inviting all of you to do this fun, short meme. And if ya do it, let me know!

Four Places I Go Over and Over and Over

To the refrigerator
To the computer
Safeway....because there's a Starbucks inside.
and Crazy

Four People Who Email/IM Regularly

Treena
Treena
Um Treena
and oh, Treena

Four Places I Like to Eat

Red Robin
El Valle
PF Changs (just found this out, yum-o!)
McDonald's (what can I say, I'm a cheap date)

Four Places I'd Rather Be Right Now

Back in Tigard (our time was too short!)
Hawaii
New York
and any sort of road trip

Four TV Shows I Could Watch Over and Over and Over

Friends
Saved by the Bell
and I think that covers 'er. Not a big tv watcher and the 2 shows I could watch again and again aren't even on anymore!

So, there's some random stuff about me. =)

We were away for a couple of days to go visit Josh's sister, Treena. I could spend forever there. I'm not the biggest city fan but being with them is one of my favorite things, ever. I also enjoy buying things without paying tax, gotta love Oregon for that! We watched my nieces play basketball, ate, laughed, burped, laughed some more...drove around Lake Oswego looking at some interesting art. I'll post pictures later (Phil!) that we took.

It was a fun trip and I look forward to going back soon. Like in a few weeks soon. =) Ready for a road trip, Denise?

It's time for this girl to go to bed now. Remember, if you do the meme, let me know!

Never say Never, That's what I'm Learnin'

Before Josh and I had kids we were amazing parents.

No, really. We were.

We'd never give our kids soda until they were 13. We'd never let them sleep with us. We'd always be on top of every disobedient action. We'd never let them say this or do that. And for sure we'd never let them eat dog food.

And then we actually had the kids.

And it's a whole new ball game.

The things we said we'd never do, many of them, most of them, heck, all of them...we have. Some things we didn't do with Jaylee, that we have with Alison. I have people in my life quick to point them out. =) A baby gate being one of them. We didn't use a gate with Jaylee. For the most part when Jaylee was Alison's age, she was obedient and not too curious about why she was being told no. Alison, oh, Alison...just this morning she fell down the first step in our entryway from the kitchen. Ugh! And I don't want a repeat of this so a gate will be put up now. I also wake Alison up occasionally when she's sleeping, just so I can hold her. That age old rule about not waking a sleeping baby...I haven't followed it so well sometimes. When Alison was tiny I did just because when she slept was the only time it was quiet. But now, now that she's easier, I like to just pick her up and smell her and nuzzle her and squeeze her til she squeaks! =) Another thing we didn't do with Jaylee was leave her in her carseat, if we went places, she rode in the carseat but we immediately took her out of it when we got to our destination. With two of them, especially in the beginning, it was easier to leave Alison in her carseat to run in and grab coffee or go into the bank, rather than try to make sure her head wasn't going to roll off while I fumbled through my purse, held onto my three year old and opened up doors or grabbed some groceries. Now that Alison sits up and holds herself while I hold her, we don't use the carseat as much to lug her into places.

I understand that I sound lazy. And I'm totally okay with that. I'm learning to be okay with the fact that I was wrong about some stuff. Most stuff. Everything. I'm learning. Learning to not take myself so seriously. Learning to be easier on myself for things. Being a wife, a mom, a woman isn't an easy deal sometimes, rather than kick myself for everything wrong thing I said or did, I'm figuring out (finally!) to just let stuff roll. And learn from it.

I also said after Alison was born and cried for almost three months that we'd never have another one...

Who knows, maybe I'm wrong there, too.

Her First Christmas

I love this kid.

That'll teach me

Sigh.

Heavy sigh.

A few minutes ago Jaylee comes in with something in her mouth. I ask her what it is and she tells me, "food."

Um, duh. (Didn't say this out loud, just thought it all grown up like.)

It wasn't just any kind of food. It was Shadow's food.

She asks if she can spit it out and I told her no. That'll teach 'er!

She leaves. Comes back. Sits herself in her princess chair and she has a little bowl full of snacks. I look down and see that her lil bowl is filled with more dog food.

See why I sigh!?

Dear Dog

You are a guest in our home. We have fed you and watered you. Let you out when you needed to do your thang and let you sleep on our couch while your parents have been away.

All we ask in return is that:

When you are done with the 5 magazines and 1 pair of shoes that you tore apart all over the living room and then proceeded to eat, that you'd please not puke them up in pieces but whole as you found them.

Thank you, kindly.

Sarah

Just Call us Monica and Chandler

If you didn't watch Friends or don't own all the seasons (like I used to before I GAVE THEM AWAY) then you may not understand at all what I'm about to talk about. However, I think Corie will fully know what episode I'm talking about. =)

On New Year's Eve we were asked to chauffeur some friends to their 25th anniversary party. They were hoping to rent a limo but strangely many limo services either don't operate in the winter or they were booked. Fancy that.

The Josh and Sarah Limovan is always available though, so we took our friends to the party held in their honor. Phil and Linda are the couple I clean for, the couple whose yard during the summer we take care of. In Phil's terms he is 70 in round numbers and Linda is 60 in round numbers. They are two of my favorite people in all the world. Seriously. He is an ornery sonofagun and she's a hold nothin' back kinda lady. She's generous. So generous. Phil picks on me and I pick back.

The Saturday after Christmas is when I offered our Limovan services. Phil warns me his son will be at the party and that his son is just like him. Oh, Lord, not two of them!

But oh, yes, there are two of them.

Josh and I had a wonderful, wonderful time with their family and friends. Even his son. But mostly his son's wife. =) We chatted with the two of them and their two teenage daughters for a better part of the evening. We were given a peek into the last 25 years of Phil and Linda's marriage and saw how much they are loved by their children and their friends.

After we left and dropped Phil and Linda off, Josh was saying how much he really enjoyed Andy and Teresa. In a short amount of time we felt like we clicked with them and would easily consider them new friends.

And then I reminded Josh of when Monica and Chandler returned from their honeymoon and how they thought they'd made friends with another couple on the plane but the couple had given them a wrong number and in reality were pretty scared of them and made up as many excuses as possible to never hang out with them again.

After reminding Josh of this episode, yeah, we're thinking maybe Andy and Teresa are like that couple on the plane and Josh and I are Monica and Chandler.

Nice. Real nice.

A New Year filled with more resolutions I'll never stick to. Sweet.

Happy New Year! Or as Josh says, "Happy Nude Year!" (the guy can hope)

Every year he says that.

Every year.

And every year I laugh.

I checked my archives to see my 2008 resolution and I think...think I can say that I did become maybe a smidge more quiet. Definitely times I could have been even more quiet but then definitely times I held my tongue. Thank You, Lord, for teaching me!

After our spiel last night (more on this later) Josh and I came home, went upstairs, and even though it was after 2 am, we just chatted. He has the day off today so I asked him what he wanted to do with his day off. He didn't really have any ideas so I told him we could write out our New Years Resolutions.

"Do we do that?" he asks.

I always do. Obviously he doesn't. And just because I do, doesn't mean I ever follow through.

I still think it's important to have goals. Whether we accomplish them or not. It's always good to have something you want to work on. Pretty sure about 90% of people want to lose weight. Definitely on that bandwagon (and sure to fall out of that wagon at any moment) but this year my resolutions are a deeper issue for me than my extra 20 lbs. Though if any of you would like to take a pound or 12 from me, I'm willing to share. 'Cause I'm nice like that.

In 2009 I want to be content.

Yuck, I said the word aloud. C-O-N-T-E-N-T, content. Content. Mr. Webster (circa 1700 edition) says content means to be happy enough with what one has or is; not desiring something more or different; satisfied.

Satisfied.

Yeah, I'm not. It seems I can always think of something else that I just neeeeed. But I don't. I have a roof over my head, food to eat, clothes to wear and a family that loves me. I need nothing. Life is good, folks, life is good. I just need to focus on that instead of all that stuff I neeeeed. I want to love this house my husband provides for me. I want to love this crummy town we live in and be thankful that besides Treena, all our family lives within 60 miles of us. I need to be thankful that even though my house isn't huge, it's comfortable. And in every room my husband has busted his knuckles to make it better for me. I need to be satisfied that my bills are paid and I still have some money leftover to buy coffee. Maybe not everyday or twice a day but enough. There are folks all over this world that have so much less than I do. I need to remember I am one blessed chick.

I can think of one way where not being satisfied is good. And that's my relationship with Jesus. I'm not satisfied there. I need to be more into Him and less into me and the things of this world. I'm not satisfied with the amount of time I spend with the only Father I have. I'm not satisfied that I sometimes push Him to the back burner because I just have to get this or that done before I dig into His Word. The bible study we attend on Sunday nights with Trevor and Megan, I don't talk much. This week Trevor asked me about it. I don't say much because I don't know much. And after being in church for 14 years, there's really no excuse to not know my bible. To not know my Jesus. I'm not satisfied. I will be changing this.

Another area I want to work on is acknowledging the good I see in women in my life. Whether I know them IRL or just through this black box. And when I acknowledge it, not compare myself to it. Just enjoy that the Lord has made us each different to help each other, to complement each other. I want to stop thinking that just because one woman does something better than me (in almost every way) doesn't mean that I'm no good. It's very easy for me to pick all the bad stuff out about me instead of seeing something good. (I tried to pinpoint something and couldn't!) So, here's to you. Women in my life. Some of you may never read this but I want others to know you are amazing.

Treena is amazing at keeping her house, she starts a project, she finishes it. You can count on her. She gives good gifts and then just keeps giving them. Amber, is a helper. You need her, she's there. You don't have to ask, she's just there. She helps, she does what needs to be done without you saying what you need. Megan is encouraging and loving and says the right thing. Emily and Gayle have four children each, homeschool them and seem to keep their sanity. Kristie works full time, has a husband and three boys, is involved with her friends, her church, her community but still has the time to shoot me an email telling me she loves me and to have a great day. Denise...her and I are polar opposites in so many ways, yet so alike in others. She encourages me in my wifely-ness, makes me laugh and helps me to see good in me. She's sincere and she's honest and I love our conversations. My mother-in-law. I don't even know where to start with this woman. This last week she has shown me what it means to honor thy mother. She has been a rock(star) for her mom this week and I am awed by her love for her mama.

Another resolution would be to enjoy my girls more. Lately I feel like I live for the day to be over. That I'm counting the hours til bedtime. I hate that feeling. I want to love them and love our craziness. I want to smother them with love and kisses. I want them to know that I think they rock and I'm proud to be their mama.

And last but not least, I'm choosing to be a helper to my husband. I don't want our marriage to be stale. I don't want to go through the motions of being man and wife. I want to enjoy growing old with this man. I want for him to feel he's the luckiest man on earth. I want to love him and love our craziness. I want to smother him with love and kisses. I want him to know that I think he rocks and I'm proud to be his wife.

Really glad I have a year for this 'cause I'm pretty sure it's going to take all 365 days.

What are your resolutions?