Birthday Giveaway!

<center><a href="http://joshua24-15.blogspot.com/"><img src="http://i601.photobucket.com/albums/tt94/memoriesbydesign/Lil-House-Birthday-Giveaway.jpg"/></a></center></td>

Can you believe it?! An entire month has already flown by!

The giveaway this month is really hard for me to um, give away. I love it. A lot. But I must love all of you waaay more!


Two fun items! A 'Memories-Made-Easy-Journal' and a grocery shopping planner!


The tabs are: Meal Planning, Shopping Lists, TakeOut Menus, Recipes and Leftovers


Recipes are included!


And the 'leftovers' tab contains some fun stickers where you can fill in what day it was opened, what day it needs to be discarded and who the food belongs to. So fun!

The journal comes with a coupon to send in for a FREE subscription to Parents magazine. So, whether you're having a baby or know someone who is-I thought this was a total bonus!

The journal has cool little entries that are started for you. Here's just a couple: 'you make me smile when you...' 'i love you more each day because...' 'i'll never forget when you..' and so on.

There ya have it!

Birthday Giveaway Number 3!

To enter, just leave a comment and be prepared to email me your address if you're chosen.

If you'd like to increase your chance of winning, add my button to your blog and/or post on your own blog between now and tomorrow night about the giveaway. Make sure you let me know you've done it.

And for anyone who has NEVER commented before you'll be entered twice automatically (you know, IF you leave a comment this time) and you'll be entered a third time should you post to your blog about the Birthday giveaway!

Winner will be randomly selected through random.org on Thursday, September 3rd (Nine months before my 30th!!!! Birthday!)

Good luck!!!

If you're wondering what the hay this Birthday Giveaway is about...go here.

*sorry the photos are kinda lame, took them with my phone.

An Ode to Dorothy

That day in October 2006 changed my life.

The day I came over to help you clean your house before you moved into your new one.

We hadn't seen each other in 8 years but this day would be the beginning of a friendship I so badly needed.

A friendship, I believe we both badly needed.

Pretty much for the next two years we'd be inseparable. It was either dinner at your house with your fam or dinner at my house with mine. At one point Josh asked me, "what did we do before life with Amber?" To which I had no response.


We were pool dolphins. Not sharks, because those are scary and we're anything but.

We brought back the fanny pack.
We started the annual Christmas get together.
Simple trips like to Target or WinCo, it didn't matter how simple it was, we had fun. We made it fun!

Of course there were the exciting trips to see Dirty Dancing with Johnny and Baby on the Big Screen or when we fulfilled our lifelong dream of seeing New Kids on the Block in CONCERT this last November.

The nights we had the cops called on us. Ahem.
Times remembering all the boys we loved in high school that never returned said love. Dumb boys anyhow, huh? Who needs 'em?

You've been there for me for almost three years. You've been an amazing friend.

And for the last few months, things have been different. We're changing. We're growing. And sadly, it doesn't seem that we're doing these things together. And quite honestly, it makes me panic. I haven't seen you in two months, it's been almost two months since we've talked on the phone.

But you aren't far from my thoughts, my prayers. My heart.

A year ago today I was making you Peanut Butter Bars and praying the UPS man would get here in time with your gift before you, Shawn, Josh and I headed to Red Robin in your honor.

Today, I sit here without a gift for you, because I just have no clue, I'm at a loss. I don't know what you're doing today. Or what you're doing tonight. I know you don't care much for your birthday but I'm hoping someone is making your day memorable. Letting you know how special you are, how amazing of a friend you are.

I love you, Amber.

Happy Birthday, my friend.
Love,
Blanche

Talk to the Man

I haven't forgotten you. It's just that I seem to be outta stuff to write.

So, how 'bout we shake things up a bit?

We like to shake, no?

How about in the comments section, or in an email, you ask my husband a question. About whatever.

You only get my side of things, this way...you can get the real version. ;)

I'll take questions up til Friday morning and then my post on Friday will be his answers to everything you're just d.y.i.n.g to know.

Because I like the Number 3 and I have nothing else to blog about

Three names I go by:
1. Mama
2. Sarie
3. Sarah

Three jobs I’ve had in my life:
1. Walking paper route girl
2. Barista
3. Assistant Manager at Pier 1 Imports

Three places I’ve lived:
1. Arizona
2. California
3. Washington State

Three favorite drinks:
1. Iced Hazelnut Breve
2. Sangria
3. Slightly sweetened Iced Tea

Three television shows I watch:
1. We don't have tv.
2.
3.

Three of my favorite foods:
1. Oreos with a glass of milk
2. Peanut Butter and Jelly sandwiches (made by someone else)
3. anything Mexican

Three of my favorite restaurants:
1. El Valle
2. Red Robin
3. Chang's Mongolian Grill

Three things I couldn’t live without:
1. a toothbrush
2. flip flops
3. Kitchen Aid mixer

Three things I can’t stand:
1. People who chew with their mouth open
2. Slow/bad drivers (post on that coming to a blog near you!)
3. phone calls that aren't returned.

Three things I’m decent at:
1. Sleeping
2. Eating
3. Laughing

Three things I’m looking forward to this weekend:
1. Church on Sunday, I feel like it's been forever.
2. Cooking dinner.
3. Hopefully finishing the last bit of fence we have left to put up!

Three things I’m addicted to:
1. Blogging-whether reading them or writing my own.
2. Coffee
3. Flip flops

Head on over to Amy Beth's if ya wanna see her answers!

Check Up

I went in today for the first of my six-month checkups. For two years I've gone in every three months to have my liver function checked. They're on the look out to see if my cancer has returned.

The lab slip came in the mail a couple of weeks ago. The return address always causes a lump in my throat. I know what's inside the envelope.

I was on the phone with a friend today and I remembered I needed to have my blood work done. Today has been better than yesterday (by far) but still my mood is blah. I wasn't really excited about getting the girls changed into clothes fit for public, going out into public and then dealing with the public.

Our community hospital makes me want to commit myself.

Alas, today wasn't so bad. I was registered fairly quickly. They had to change my insurance information since we've changed that with Josh's new job. Now, I'll get a bill for the full amount instead of just 20%.

That gives me the shivers.

The girl registering me asks if I know where the lab is.

I tell her I do.

I've walked that hallway many many times.

The girls and I hold hands, we round the corner and we're almost to the door of the tiny waiting room when Spice trips over nothing and bloodies her nose. She's screaming because that's what she does best.

I offer her food.

Because that's what I do best.

She calms down and we enter the room. No one was in there but us and that was glorious.

They called my name and the girls and I went into an even smaller room. Sugar knows what to do. She stands very still by the door and watches. Spice sat on my lap and I had to keep her grubby hands from trying to grab the needle.

The girl who stuck me, stuck me good. It hurt this time. Usually it doesn't.

She hands Sugar some pretty princess paper to color when we get home and tells us to have a nice day.

I load the girls into the hot van and I'm thinking how I deserve a coffee. It's hot. I've been taking care of the girls alone for a couple days. I was just screened for cancer, etc.

But I drove home.

Leaving the hospital parking lot I told the Lord that I really don't even know what to pray every time I have my blood drawn. I trust that He had a plan with the whole cancer deal and that He still has a plan now.

I'm just praying that no cancer is still part of that plan.

Nevermind

Over the last few weeks Josh and I have been talking about having another baby. Not any time soon. Just some time.

After days like today I realize I can barely handle the two I have.

Adding another would surely do me in.

I know not all days are like today. But many of them are. I think it would be unwise for us to add more babies to our family just because I'm worried I'll regret it later.

Right now two seems more than I can handle.

My Day

It's not been good. Sorry. Don't mean to be a downer. It's just kinda sucked. I don't know if I'm pms'ing or what my deal is but seriously.

Rough.

Day.

I'm really wanting to lose weight and I'm really sucking at it. I was stuck at 135 forever and hated it. Now I'm pushing 145 and really wishing I could go back a coupla months when I felt fat at 135.

I finally packed up every piece of size 2 and extra small clothing I own. It's all washed and folded nicely. Waiting to go to a store tomorrow where I'm hoping to make a lil cashola for my trip this weekend.

Packing up these clothes was hard. Embarrassingly hard. I have such an emotional attachment to these clothes. They represent a time when I was thin. A time where I was excited to get dressed in the morning because I didn't worry about covering up this fat roll or that fat roll. I loved my jeans. I loved wearing skirts because at that time I didn't have cankles.

Now...now I have a couple different outfits. I feel fat. I feel frumpy. And skinny people are wondering, "um, then why don't you do something about it?!"

Easy to say.

Not always so easy to do.

Part of me feels like packing those clothes up and taking them to be sold means I've given up on ever wearing them again. That I'm succumbing to being overweight forever. I don't want to feel that way. I don't want that to be the truth.

Josh didn't want me to get rid of the clothes.

"You'll never be able to afford those brands of clothes again if you lose the weight."

He's right.

At the time I had no kiddos and worked at an espresso stand making great tips. I could pay cash for fun clothes. And I really liked it.

I'll never be able to pay $97 for a pair of jeans again.

Enough of the clothes talk.

Let's move on to parenting!

I'm bad at it.

Spice is the naughtiest baby I've ever met. She will sit at the table and cry/scream until food is placed in front of her. I just stare. Sugar was NOT like that. I thought it was because I was this amazing (pfft) mom and she was just a good girl. Not so. I'm still the same mom, I just have a kid with a completely different personality than her sister.

Josh tells me all these things I need to be doing to work with Spice. It's easy to say when you're 500 miles away...

She's teething. Molars are coming in and she's letting me know it. The other day I couldn't put her down. I'd try and she'd clench her chubby legs around my waist as hard as she could. Had I not been so appalled, I may have found it funny.

She's a beast.

Shall we move on to my housekeeping skillz?

I don't have any.

Moving on.

Right now I'm just wish everything that needs to be done before tomorrow evening were already done.

And wishing it were Saturday morning.

The To Do List and a LOT of Parenthesis

It's barely 7 am and I'm already exhausted.

Just thinking about everything I need to do is tiring me out.

Being gone five days a week and then jetting off once the weekend comes leaves our real house (the one not on 26 wheels) a little ragged.

We aren't here very much. So when we are, we choose to just hang out and not do much in the area of work. However, we have a house that always needs work. Sitting around, hanging out, are not things we should do when we're here. But it's what we do.

And then times like now make me realize I have just GOT to get SOMEthing done around here. Josh called his mom and asked if she'd watch the girls today while I did some work. She, of course, agreed.

In a couple of hours I'll take the girls over there and then start these projects:

• Trim and mow the yard (weather permitting, looks like it could rain)
• Trim and mow the pasture (again, weather permitting)
• Pull weeds around our property ( I may use the weed burner if it's not raining)
• Clean off our back deck of all toys, junk, dog hair, etc. (yes, DOG HAIR)
• Move the rigs out from under the carport and clean in there
• Work on our upstairs (gives me the shivers just thinking about it)
• Vacuum
• Dust
• Clean the bathroom (one of the things I'm EXCITED to do. I love to clean the bathroom.)
• Laundry, only two loads to do woo hoo!
• Pack up my pre-children clothes and take them to this really fun store Melissa told me about that will BUY them! (stoked for the money. sad to get rid of the clothes.)
• Change the bedding in Spice's bed.
• Sweep and mop the kitchen
• Sweep and mop the bathroom
• make a few meals for this weekend (we're having company but I won't be here, so I'm going to be a good lil wife (pfft) and make some food for the men folk and children) (so they don't eat cereal and beer all weekend) (the kids wouldn't be having the beer, promise.)
• Vacuum my van (pretty sure I have the entire McDonald's restaurant on the floor of my van.)

I think that covers 'er. The basement needs a good cleaning too but I'm thinking of just striking a match for that part of the house.

What's your to-do list look like?

Some stuff before we head out for a weekend o' fun

First off...just want to let you all know that my lurker came forward. She emailed me. She's not freaky. All is good. Call off the dogs.

We leave in approximately 3, 4 or 5 hours from now. When your husband drives a truck for a living you just have to throw all time frames out the window.

That makes me CRAZY!!

(crazier?!)

Do you see my new blog design?!?!? If you're reading in google reader, get out NOW! and look at my new prettiness. I'm in lurv. Thank you to my amazing SIL Denise.

She rocks.

And now my blog design does too!

I bought some towels at Target the other day for my bathroom. We've had the same towels for the last 11 years and this is getting redarndiculous. I only bought two bath towels, two washcloths and one hand towel for now. Towels ain't cheap folks, not at all. I'm hoping to add to my collection soon. Soon like in before they discontinue 'em.

I like them. They're striped with brown, cream, blue and some green. That makes them sound ugly, but I promise they aren't.

I decided this morning that I'm going to leave my phone at home for the weekend. My phone is my access to all things internet-ish and I may or may not be freaking out about my decision. It's a good one and I'm excited to just focus on my family and have them know they mean more to me than that dumb phone.

Pray for me.

Speaking of prayer...thank you to everyone who left comments or emailed me about how I could pray for you. Man, oh man. It's amazing how praying for someone else and their needs really takes the focus off self. You're being prayed for and if I haven't emailed you back, know that I will next week.

I made a peach cobbler a little bit ago to take with us to Portland. Mmmmm. Of course I had to try it...you know, to make sure it was good enough to let others eat. I loved it. And considered eating it all. 'Cause, didja know? That if you make or bake something and eat it all before anyone knows it's been made...it never really was made and no one has to know! Your butt and thighs might but no one else will!

I'm going on a mini-vacation next weekend. Mini as in just overnight but I can't tell you how super duper freakin' excited I am! No kids. No husband. Just me. Well, and a friend of course! Yay!

Of course I'll tell you all about it later. You'll see pictures and if you follow me on Twitter, I'm sure I'll be talking about our trip. Or FB if we're friends on there.

Alright, enough of my random post. I have one kid eating, one kid sleeping and 273 things left on my to do list.

What are YOU doing this weekend?

Call me Paranoid

A coupla days ago one of ya took a fancy to reading my blog.

For a few hours.

Without leaving a single comment on any of the posts!!!

So, if you're from Tennessee and you were reading for the better part of a day on the August 4th, could you leave me a comment. So that way I'm not freaked out anymore.

You can email me if you'd rather. truckfamily@gmail.com

Thanks!!!

It's Your Turn

For the past few months you've all been absolutely amazing readers.

Amazing friends.

One day out of nowhere I had a girl email me with such encouraging words. I didn't know her. Didn't know she'd been reading my blog. Yet she blessed me like crazy letting me know she's been praying for me.

Now, we email back and forth as time allows and I'm trying to talk my husband into traveling a bit further in that truck so I can meet her!

The thing that gets me is how faithful you've all been to love on me and pray for me. Many of you don't even know me. Yet, you leave comments or you send emails letting me know that you've lifted me up in prayer.

I can't tell you how that warms this girl's heart!

I feel I've been selfish though. I've taken and taken and taken some more. Without once asking how I could pray for you.

So, I'd like to do just that. I'd like to pray for you.

If you'd like, leave your prayer request in the comment section or you can email me at truckfamily@gmail.com or you can just leave your name and say that you have an unspoken request.

Whatever you want prayer for.

Don't believe in prayer? I do and I'll pray for you anyway.

$25 Winner is....

Maria!

I can turn that $25 into a gift card to Starbucks if you'd like. It might be out of my way to go there today...but I can do it. Sigh. ;)

So, email me on FB and give me your address.

Thinking next month it's going to be shot glasses, y'all seemed to think those would be a hoot.

And Jeana, seriously. Your comment is why I miss your blog. Ya kill me.

Thanks to everyone who entered and put the button up, you all ROCK!

Cash Money Giveaway

<center><a href="http://joshua24-15.blogspot.com/"><img src="http://i601.photobucket.com/albums/tt94/memoriesbydesign/Lil-House-Birthday-Giveaway.jpg"/></a></center></td>

Finally! Sorry! I know I said I'd have this posted this morning and technically in my time zone it is still morning. I'm just not getting the post done as early as I would have liked.

If anyone is new here to this lil bloggy of mine, this is the deal: My birthday is June 3rd. I really love my birthday. And the next one I'm having is big.

My big 3-0!

And I want to celebrate with all my blog friends. Starting last month, I decided to do a giveaway on my blog each month on the third until my birthday.

I know I had a whole month to come up with something to give you for today but of course I put it off and put it off, because I wouldn't be me if I didn't procrastinate.

I decided I'd look in all the truck stops we stopped at this week to see if anything would be appealing to any of you. (Again, for those new here, my husband, two daughters and I live in a Peterbilt and drive around the Pacific Northwest all week.)

So, at the truck stops I considered shot glasses that said, "Everything's Bigger in Montana!" Or shirts that said, "Save a Kenworth, Drive a Peterbilt." And then there were gift certificates for 356 oz. Big Gulps.

And a truck stop wouldn't be a truck stop without p*orn.

None of this appealing to you?

Didn't think so.

So, for August, in celebration that my birthday is a mere 10 months away, I'm giving away...

CASH!

Not much. But you know, we have to build up to the big birthday bash of 2010.

So, you're entering today to win Twenty Five smackeroos.

$25.

You can order it in ones or fives. Maybe three fives and a ten. Get wild with it. It's going to be your money, afterall.

To enter, just leave me a comment and your email address if I don't already have it.

To enter twice, leave a comment, then grab my button at the top of this post-go to your blog, post about my giveaway with a link on over here and come back to comment that you did that and that'll enter you in twice!

Easy peasy and not a bit sleazy. (Huh?) (Yeah, I dunno.)

Just know that if you're the winner you'll have to email me your address.

Entries until midnight on Sunday PST and I'll announce the winner on Monday August 3rd (10 months before my birthday)

And for giggles, in the comments...tell me your favorite color.

Happy Commenting!!!

Things that make me laugh when I'm cooped up in the truck

Part of me is scared to share with you the things that make me laugh.

You may send me a straight jacket for my birthday. (which is 10 months and 4 days from now) (don't forget to come by tomorrow to see what the giveaway is and sign yerself up!)

Ahem, anywho.

Late last night which was probably just early this morning, while sitting in the passenger seat, I looked down and decided something.

I don't need to wear a bra anymore.



You see, I have a nice little (okay, it's not so little) belly shelf. It totally holds up my boobies and is going to save me a FORTUNE on bras.

I knew I had a reason for being chubby.

Inside the bathroom stalls at truck stops they have little advertisements, I took a picture of one for you.




I'm thinking- "would I be sitting in here if I didn't?!"

Funny, right?

On Monday during our truck-problem-fiasco, Josh was on the phone with his boss while I ran in to get coffee. I asked him if he wanted one. He shakes his head and mouths 'no'.

I got him one anyway and when I handed it to him, I said, "because sometimes no means yes."

His response, with a smirk on his face...

"I'll remember that."

-- Post From My iPhone

Now I Remember

After over a month at home, the girls and I are back out on the road!

It's been a slow week. Which is bad for the pocketbook but good to help us ease back into our truck family groove.

We started out bright and early (but not too early as Starbucks is not open before six) only to be put on hold because there was something wrong with the truck. Whenever something like this happens we try to make the most of it so we headed to the park for awhile so the kiddos could play (and I could drink my coffee.)

Fast forward a few hours....

Our first load was delivering seed bins about two hours from home. Once we finished that we were told to head home because there wasn't a run for us to do. Had we not had issues in the morning we would have had a load.

Stupid truck. :)

Tuesday Josh went and loaded pipe, unloaded it and then reloaded hay. He picked us up and we headed 250+ miles to Lynden, WA. It's a couple hop, skips and jumps from Canada.

Unloaded hay.

Reloaded lumber (you know much I LOVE lumberyards!) and headed east to Idaho. We got sidetracked by a lake and pulled the truck into a state park. It's been crazy hot in WA so the water was wonderful! Spice has zero fear of the water (you know I want to throw a morbid joke in here, right?)

After dinner in the truck....


We drove about 450 miles yesterday.

Josh and I were up at five this morning, we saw the sun rise and I was reminded that just a few hours before I'd see the sun SET. Why be up so early?!

Unloaded the lumber by 7:30 am and headed toward a small bit o' Heaven. (Starbucks)

We took a walk...








And then headed to the park in Coeur d' Alene. You might recognize this park from one of our first trips out when Sugar stripped her clothes. This time her parents kept an eye on her skivvies. :)






Bath time!


And then a little relaxing...




And in case you're wondering how we do laundry on the road....



As I type we're being dispatched to St. Maries, ID heading to Jerome, ID.

We're enjoying being together. And you won't believe what I'm about to say...

You may want to sit down for it...

I'm GLAD to be in the truck!

-- Post From My iPhone

Get Ready for Saturday

I know I need to blog about something. It's been a few days. I have a post that's been swirling in my head.

In my heart.

I think I need to pray about it before I just start writing it out. I don't want this post to be about my feelings on it but what Jesus feels about it. Makes no sense right now, huh?

Sorry.

So, until then, I just wanted to remind you that the birthday giveaway will be announced on Saturday! If you'd like your name entered twice, announce the giveaway on your blog with a link to mine, then come back and leave another comment letting me know you posted about it.


Winner will be announced on Monday, August 3rd...aka 10 months before my 30th Birthday!!!

<center><a href="http://joshua24-15.blogspot.com/"><img src="http://i601.photobucket.com/albums/tt94/memoriesbydesign/Lil-House-Birthday-Giveaway.jpg"/></a></center></td>

Thank you, Denise, for making my button and thank you, Jackie, for making a code for me! What would I do without people who know what they're doing!?

So, grab the button...stick it on your blog and let people know about the monthly giveaway!

Gangsta Gnomes

Take a look below at my new signature! Isn't she pretty? Thank you, Emily!

Yesterday the girls and I packed up and headed to Emily's house. We've been having the best time!

Gayle came over and they took me to Goodwill Outlet. They kept warning me that this place was G.R.O.S.S but that if I could look past the nasty, I could get some great stuff for super cheap.

They didn't lie.

It was kinda gross.

And I got 11 lbs worth of clothes for my girls for under 10 bucks! Smokes! Goodwill in my town is ridiculously priced. 10 bucks in my town would have gotten me a couple of shirts. I got a bunch of nice, name brand clothes for pennies. Amazing.

I'm hooked.

We came back to the house and Emily cooked an awesome breakfast for dinner while Gayle and I pretended to help but mostly sat chatting getting to know each other.

Girls, I have loved her two blogs for quite awhile now, to meet her...made it even better. She has this super sweet voice and I love her laugh.

We ate, took pictures (see below), played games (Emily won, of course) and then we talked for hours. I went to bed at 2:12! I love the tired feeling I woke up with today. These girls are wonderful. They love Jesus and their husbands and their kids. I've been so blessed.

Kinda thinking I may not go home. (Shh...don't tell Emily.)

Um, and I also held a chicken.
Don't be jealous.

Today Makes 10

Years.


A decade since I lost my dad.


Ten years since he drown in the river while boating with friends.


Ten years since I've heard the infectious laugh. Since I've seen the bushy hair under his hat. Ten years since I've seen his friendly smile. Since we've gone to lunch. Ten years since he hugged me.


Ten years ago Josh and I were in San Diego celebrating our first anniversary when we receive a call. A call to come home. A call that has forever changed my life.


I do anything possible to push that hurt away. I joke constantly about my dad drowning. It's the only way I can deal. But one day out of 365 I let myself be sad. I let myself think more about him and how I wish it could have been.


I let myself play the "if only" game.


If only he hadn't died, he'd be able to play with his two granddaughters. Would have held them the day they were born and watched them grow. My dad never held me, never saw me, until I was eight months old, I used to think about how when I had kids at least then he'd be able to see them and hold them and experience what he missed 29 years ago when I was born.


But it wasn't to be.


He didn't get (rather, take) the chance 29 years ago and he didn't get the chance this time around.


If only he'd been around when my life was falling apart, maybe he could've helped. Or maybe he would have been disappointed...


I hate this day. I do. Because it reminds me all over again that yep, he's dead. And nope, he's never coming back. I think about it everyday. Still. After 10 years not a day has gone by that I haven't thought about him or wished him alive.


Because even though I'm 29, I still want my daddy. I still miss him. I miss the light in his eyes when I'd come walking through his shop. I even miss the uncomfortable-ness of hanging out. Our relationship didn't come easy since we were never around each other much until I turned 18. But we were getting there.


I miss him. I just do.


Thankful that this year I'll be spending this day with friends.

The Camping Trip-In Pictures

One of 327 pictures we tried to take together. Just wasn't workin' out so great.

Safest place for the wave runner...if you ask me.

She smiles now but she was not pleased when it was over.

The cutest camper ever.

Mosquitos rampaged our campground. Jerks.

I have quite a few more pictures than this but for some reason it won't upload them onto my blog. I've been trying for close to an hour and my nerves are fried.

I camp because it's something my husband enjoys and because I want to create memories for our family. Camping has never been something I've truly enjoyed.

Until this last weekend.

I had the time of my life. And so did Josh. Hanging out with Jim and Emily and their awesome family was medicine for my heart. I laughed harder this last weekend than I have in ages. Ahhh...such sweet fun.

I loved watching Josh and Jim. The boys were separated at birth. Not only do they look alike (wish I could upload the pic so you could see for yourself) but they have similar interests and talked as much as Emily and I did...um, if not more.

I was thankful for the patience of 4 older girls with my two young daughters. They were SO good with them. (Thank you, Girlies!)

When my computer decides to quit flaking out on me, I'll post more.

Jim, Emily, Girls...Thank you for the greatest weekend ever. We had a blast.

Update on Wounded

A few of you saw a post I wrote late last night when feelings were raw.

Sorry if I freaked anyone out. And thank you to those who responded telling me they're praying.

Need it.

But for those of you who saw, please know that in no way was that directed at my sweet husband. Him and me? We're tight. All's good on the home front.

It's hard finding stuff out that you weren't meant to find out. It's hard getting news that someone who is supposed to love you is merely pretending. I don't know what to do with that. I guess there is nothing to do with that. Josh said my reaction to it is what will prove that I'm not the person I'm being made out to be. And I'm sure that makes no sense to anyone.

But it's completely affected my mood today and I just yelled at Sugar over something completely dumb. And I called my husband asking if he'd asked about whether or not he has vacation time coming to him or not, only to find out that, nope...he didn't call. And nope, he's not planning to ask and so I told him we were done talking.

I couldn't sleep last night for the longest time. I was sick to my stomach, sick in my heart. It's miserably hot and I'm so tired. I should nap while the girls are but I still haven't finished the clean up from The Greatest Camping Trip I've ever Been On.

I'll post about that later. Promise.

For now, I'm going to go lick my wounds.

Battin' a Thousand

We're on our way to the weekend of camping fun. Sometimes I'm not sure those two words should be in the same sentence but I think (hope, pray, beg!) that this trip will be fun.

But it's off to a rough start.

We left about an hour after Emily's family because they have a longer drive.

Ten miles into the trip I realize I forgot the taco meat for the taco salad I'm making for dinner. So...

Back home we go.

About an hour into the trip Josh remembers our tabs on our Suburban expired July 1st.

Sigh...

And since there's probably a warrant out for my arrest already for forgetting to pay my ticket, he didn't think we should chance it this weekend w/o tabs.

Soooo....I used my handy dandy phone to find the nearest licensing dept.

Josh goes in an comes back out. Empty handed.

They don't take debit cards.

Bugger.

Ohhh! But there's a bank with an ATM across the street. He runs over.

Comes back. Empty handed.

Again.

ATM is outta order.

Of course it is, why wouldn't it be?!

Bank number two had a working ATM. Josh got cash and tabs and off we go!!!




-- Post From My iPhone

Smiling

My BIL's wife...thus making her my SIL, posted today about what made her smile.

Even though I've had a good week, it's been a hard week.

Spice has been very, very sick and so very crabby. Sugar misses her daddy since we're not in the truck this week, so she's had some issues too.

But Denise's post got me thinking. What's making me smile?

I'm smiling because my husband should be home around 6:30. And when he gets here....

I'm OUTTA here! Going to Costco to grab a few things before...

Our camping trip with Emily and her sweet family (5/6 of them anyway) is making me smile. Cannot wait to hang out. The two times we've gotten together it's only been for a few hours at a time, now she's stuck with us for an entire weekend. ;)

Something else that made me smile that probably won't make anyone else smile-last night, I went to brush my teeth and just as I was about to put my toothpaste on my toothbrush, I realized it was hemorrhoid cream. I'm cracking up just thinking about it. It was really funny to me. And it was really funny when I horrified a certain friend with this information. (in case you aren't wondering, hemorrhoid cream is not in use by anyone in our household. I gave birth a year ago to an 8 and a half pound kid, 'nuf said)

I'm smiling because Spice isn't crying at the moment. This is amazing.

I'm smiling because today is my husband's Friday. A mini vacation is around the corner. (when I first typed that, I typed coroner. lol)

Just a few reasons for smiling. But they're good ones and at least I'm smiling.

Right?

Yep.

In Case You're Looking

If you've come from Amy Beth's blog and you're searching for my TMI post...here it is.

You've been forewarned. ;)

I don't want to Blink

I have a four year old.

And a one year old.

But wasn't it just yesterday that my four year old was born?

Or was it yesterday that my one year old was born?

Sigh.

The realization that I can't do anything to slow down these girls growing up is hitting me hard. But a year ago at this time...I would have been begging someone, anyone to please set the clock forward a few years.

I had a baby who cried all day and didn't sleep at night. I had a three year old that wasn't sure she was too hot on the big sister deal. I was nursing and couldn't be gone for more than 17 minutes at a time. And I was wondering ifwhen I'd get that "me" time again.

I was emotionally drained. And I wasted a whole buncha time wishing the moments away. Wishing that, for crying out loud (literally) would these kids just grow up and take care of themselves already! Wishing that I'd chosen to bottle feed. Wishing I had a nanny.

I think I wore myself out more with my wishful thinking than the girls did.

Fast forward a year.

This morning I was getting some laundry done and doing some general pickage uppage of the house (nice term, eh?) and I noticed something.

A strange something.

I had nobody underfoot.

The girls were in their room, entertaining each other. They were giggling and happy and...

leaving me alone.

It was nice. And it was...different. I remembered July of last year. How there was rarely a quiet moment. Or a giggly moment. Or a moment when I could do laundry without a baby in my arms screamin' her fool head off.

I honestly and truly thought those days would never end. I thought I'd be stuck with a crying child for the rest of my miserable life.

And then I blinked.

And here I am. Today. Where I was able to get a few things done in peace.

Of course I still had to make breakfast, lunch and dinner. I still had to change stinky diapers and wipe runny noses and hand out a coupla spankings. I cut up food into tiny bits and unplugged a sink full of toilet paper (what the heck!?) I had to tell Sugar to quit changing her clothes after the 37th shirt and I had to put Spice in her crib after she would.not.quit.crying.about.being.sick! I started the same VeggieTale over and over again. I said "no-no" about 12756 times.

And I may or may not have put them to bed an hour early tonight.

Ahem.

But I'm scared to blink. While our days can be crazy and tiring and holy cow-will-I-make-it-through-this...Pretty soon there won't be little meals to cut up, no chubby little hands to flick when they're prying open the cupboard doors AGAIN! There won't be stories to read. There won't be giggles in their room loooong after they've been put to bed.

I've had this change of heart lately. I've had this overwhelming feeling of joy over my girls. I mean, I always love them...but I don't always enjoy them. But I have been lately. I've been lovin' 'em and enjoyin' 'em like crazy.

I'm not wishing away these moments for anything. And I think I'm just not gonna blink tonight or anytime in the near future in fear that I'll wake from this amazing life I'm blessed to live.

Just Read It

I've linked you to Amy Beth's blog on a coupla different occasions.

I'm doing so again today.

I love Amy Beth. I love her heart. I love her passion. I love the way the Lord uses her to work on my heart.

I love her ability to put every emotion into words.

She's on a trip to Eg*pt right now and what she's witnessing there...I can't even imagine. Except I can a little because she's written a post that makes my heart hurt. Please visit her blog today.

Especially this post.

Giveaway on my mind!

So, I'm already getting excited for August's giveaway! Partly because I love to give ya stuff but mostly because that means I'll be that much closer to my birthday!

But here's the deal. I want to give away things you like.

Leave me a comment and let me know of some things you'd like to see given away between now and June!

the post with no rhyme or reason

It's amazing to me how quickly life can change. How, one minute (like the minutes you have a crying baby or an attitude 4 yr old) can last fo-evuh, and the minutes that you want to savor can just fly by.

A member of my family had a baby a few months ago, her second. Right now she's completely exhausted and overwhelmed. I feel this sweet mama's pain. Not too long ago that was me. In the midst of the fog of sleepless nights and crying all stinkin' day long, I was sure...absolutely sure I'd never feel normal again.

But I do.

Looking back, a year ago at this time, I was in that fog. Seems sooo long ago. Life is good now. We still have trials with these kiddos, they're just different trials. But at least there's sleep. And everyone is weaned.

Hallelujah.

A year ago my husband had a job he didn't care for. A job he went to each morning at 6:55 and came home from at 5:05. He didn't complain about it but it just wasn't his favorite place to work. And we didn't get to go with him.

Now he has a job he loves. He leaves for work on Sunday and comes home on Friday. He works up to 18 hours a day and he's a tired boy. But he's lovin' life and we get to join him whenever we want.

Life is changing so quickly. Family is always family but stuff in the mix always changes, sometimes it's good, other times not so good. Friends are changing. Making new and trying to hang on to the old, even if by a thread.

Celebrating 11 years of marriage feels so incredible to me. Our weekend was so low-key. A friend from church kept the girls on Friday night and Josh's parents had them last night. We had fun together but there wasn't this amazing, oooh-we're kid free-let's go do something-crazy deal. We're home bodies when we can be and we chose to be. Josh worked on his Suburban, I worked on FarmTown on Facebook. (latest addiction) Our weekend may seem boring to some but for us, we're just so thankful to be married. Staying together is harder than giving up, does that make sense? I guess anyone who's felt that way knows what I mean.

Being without my kids a couple different times this week was the oddest feeling. I don't want to say they complete me but...they complete me. All I ever wanted was to be a mama and when they aren't around I don't know what to do with myself. I love those girls. Even the days they make me want to pull my hair out and theirs too!

I've had to make choices in the last two weeks. Choices that weren't fun. Choices that weren't popular. But choices to be made all the same. At one point, I just asked the Lord if He would please just take care of my situation for me so I didn't have to. But sometimes the road to obedience isn't the easy road. Sometimes the road to obedience and peace, is a tough road to take. It's still hard but the peace makes those tough choices worthwhile.

A couple weeks ago I received a letter. A letter that was hard to digest. Even now, two weeks later, as I talk about it, I feel ill. It's hard to be personally attacked. It's hard to blow off lies. It's easy to let Satan take bits and pieces of that letter and whisper it in my ear, trying to make it truth.

Two weeks ago I started a diet. A diet that-for me-was absolutely ridiculous to try. I managed 5 days and lost almost 10 lbs. But I realized quickly, I was setting myself up to fail. Once again, I was trying to take matters into my own hands. I was trying to manage my food issues on my own. Counting calories, carbs, sugar, etc. Weighing food, measuring food...it's unneccessary for weight loss. What is necessary for weight loss? Asking the Lord for help. Asking for His strength in my weakness. So, it begins again. This weight loss journey that I've been on for four years.

My hope is renewed.

The point of my post?

Um, there isn't one.

Just needed to write.

And this is what came out.

And they said it wouldn't last

11 years, folks.

ELEVEN!

We look like babies, huh? I had just turned 18, Josh was 20. I loved him in spite of the flat top. He loved me in spite of the fact that for the next seven years he'd wash his own clothes, do his own dishes (you know, if I did happen to cook instead of going out to dinner), take care of my emotional instability, etc. He just didn't know he was going to love me in spite of those things! A friend of my dad's bet us 50 bucks we wouldn't make it to year five. We almost owed the guy money. Praise the Lord we made it through some tough, tough years...because these last four have been amazing. I love this man like crazy. And to still be married to me, he must love me a bunch, too.

Happy Anniversary, Babe. I love ya.

Mission: Failed

With loads of hours alone, I have spent a bunch of it thinking.

When it's quiet you can actually tell you have a brain and that stuff goes on up there.

But with that, I have to hear what's going on up there.

Today hasn't been pretty.

Not only is the house quiet because my girls aren't here but because my mom, niece and nephews aren't here either.

They've been housesitting for my aunt. They were supposed to return today but didn't. I was so excited for them to come back. I had the evening all planned out.

But my mom called and said they wouldn't be coming home tonight.

Home.

I wonder if they even feel like that's what this place is to them. I know Alexander does. He's called it that.

Today I realized we're half way into their stay here and I'm not sure I've made it a fun time for them. Sure, I've been gone a lot of that time, riding in the truck. But when I have been here, has that been okay?

No.

I don't think so. I don't think my house, rather...my attitude, has been one that makes them feel right at home. And that hurts my heart.

I know that having them move in was what the Lord wanted us to do. The timing of everything was perfect. It was right when we were leaving to go OTR, we needed someone here...they needed a place to stay. It was perfect.

All except my attitude toward it.

I haven't had a happy heart. I try to talk to Sugar all the time about how, "we need to have happy hearts." I'm telling her, but am I showing her how?

Nope.

I love having people over. I love having parties and playing cards. Then why was it such an issue for me to have family move in? Why is my heart so wretched?

My mom hasn't been feeling well lately. The kids have gone to stay with a family in the church. People the kids don't even know. Yet the couple and the kids were so excited. These people are not relatives, but they are so happy to be helpers.

I want to be that.

I want to be a happy helper.

I haven't been and I feel like I've failed my family.

I can't wait til my kids come home and it's noisy and I can't hear the stuff that goes on in my brain.

What alone time looks like for this girl

I had my sights set high yesterday when my sweet family left.

I was going to turn in early and sleep super late. I was going to take a 10 minute shower (instead of 3) I was going to shave both legs, and dance around the house to the current pop music, as loud as it would go.

In my underwear.

But it just wasn't meant to be I suppose. At about 3:45 it began to rain, waking poor Shadow. He began to pace. Then nudged me. Petting him just didn't cut it. He wanted me to get up.

Can you believe I obliged?

Me either.

At 3:45 a.m I got out of bed to feed a dog. Not a baby.

A dog.

Do you think I could go back to sleep after this?

Nope. I laid there for a little over an hour, til 5:15 when I couldn't stand it any longer.

I did shower. But I think it was only 5 minutes long. I didn't shave my legs. I washed my hair and thought about how my sweet family is 4 hours away, snuggled in the cab of a truck.

Together.

I thought about how Sugar was promising to take care of Spice as they left. I thought about how amazing my man is that he'd take two kiddos in the rig with him, for what could turn out to be a four day stretch.

He's cool like that. It was no big deal to him.

I stepped outta the shower, looked in the mirror, contemplated make-up for about .5 seconds. I wrestled on a pair of jeans, buttoning them with a rubberband. Did I really just admit that?

Yep.

I worked at cleaning the upstairs, looking at the beds of my sweet girls. Missing them.

Then stepped on a toy.

Didn't curse but may have thought about it...

Threw my hair up in a ponytail. Grabbed a lightweight jacket and headed a couple towns over for a coffee, croissant and some alone time.

It lasted all of three minutes. Seriously.

Talked to Josh on the phone. He said Spice didn't sleep last night. My heart hurts for all of them. Nights like that mean a long day for them today.

Took Josh's weekly paperwork to his boss. Snuggled their kitten and considered taking it home.

Okay, maybe I just considered getting one of my own. I love cats. Love them. It's been so long since we've had a snuggly indoor kitty. (Roger, Popcorn, Bekker, Bella, Britney, Briggs.....)

Came home to an empty (besides Shadow) house. Started laundry.

I'm back upstairs now, Pandora radio in the background (Garth Brooks is playing) and I've made a large dent in the craziness of this 495 sq ft. mess.

I need to go into town again soon.

And I'll do it without loading two girls into their carseats. I'll walk into the store without the, "when we get inside, don't touch anything and please don't ask for candy," routine.

Sure, I'm kinda lonely. But before my sweet husband left, he told me to enjoy this time for myself.

And I'm going to try.

What's a Mama to Do?

I could be shaving my legs right now.

Both legs.

Passed my knees even!

I could have the stereo turned up all the way.

To any station I want.

I could make cookie dough and eat it all by myself.

I could make dinner and not have to chop it up into tiny pieces.

I could eat mine before it's cold.

I can take up the entire bed tonight.

There's a whole lotta stuffs I could be doing right now.

Josh has Sugar and Spice with him for the week. Or, at least until he's back in the area. I have a concert to go to on Tuesday and no sitter, so that amazing man of mine offered to take the girls with him. It's possible they'll be home Wednesday but also possible they won't be home til Thursday (which this week will be Josh's Friday since he took a vacay day!)

This feels so odd. I feel very lonely. Honestly, I'm panicking a bit. I can't remember ever being away from Spice overnight. I'm pretty sure I haven't been. She was asleep before Josh left the driveway. Sugar is excited to sit up front with Daddy.

I'm trying my darndest to just be excited for the coupla days I have to myself. How often does a woman get a chance like this?! Not often!

Tomorrow, I have it all figured out. I'm going to get up early. Turn on the radio. Vacuum. Shower. Dress. Get coffee and sit outside and people watch. I love to people watch! =) Oh, and I have some goods to mail off!

If you had an entire day to yourself what would you do with it?

And the winner is.....

Mint!

I think Random.org must have known that it was 8 months til your birthday! =)

Email me at truckfamily@gmail.com with your address and I'll get this fun stuff off to ya on Monday!

Thanks to all of you for sharing with me what Freedom you're thankful for this year as we celebrate our Independence. Our freedom does not come free. Men and women are out there fighting for it every hour of every day, risking their lives. I must say, it's quite humbling. And I'm so grateful for the country we live in.

God Bless the USA!!!

Birthday Giveaway!!!

*Edited on July 20th, 2009!!!

I'll be announcing the prize for each giveaway on the FIRST of each month and then announcing the WINNER on the 3rd!*

original post is as follows...

"Whose birthday is it?" you ask...

Mine.

You know, in eleven months.

I've decided I want to celebrate the 3rd day of the month until my next birthday.

My 30th birthday!!!

Who better to celebrate with than all of you?!

I came up with this wonderful idea (all on my OWN even!) that I'll do a giveaway every month on the third. Well, the giveaway will be announced on the third, the winner will be announced on the fourth.

(I know y'all will be busy tomorrow, so make sure you check back on Monday to see if you've won!)

So, for my first birthday giveaway....

You're entering to win an Angora Scentsy warmer and two Scentsy bars. The scents I have for you are Clove & Cinnamon and Beach. Yum!




I really really think you're going to love this!* It's like a candle but not. There's a lightbulb inside the warmer that heats the bar and gives off an amazing scent. Cool thing? No smoke, no flames, and if someone decides they want to, ahem, touch the wax-it's cool to the touch. Animals, kiddos, husbands are safe from burns.

What do ya have to do to enter?

Leave a comment (c'mon Lurkers, you CAN DO IT!!!) telling me which Freedom you're thankful for this year. Comments will close @ 11:59 pst. Tonight.

Please leave me your email address, either in the comments section or you can email me @ truckfamily@gmail.com with your email address. If you're the winner, I'll need your mailing address as well, so be ready to front that if you da winner!

Have an AWESOME Fourth of July! This year, I'm thankful for the Freedom of Religion, thankful that (for now) in public or in private, I'm able to love and worship Jesus, carry my Bible around and go to a church building. In so so many countries this is not the case, we're blessed to live in the U.S.A. where, for now, we have this Freedom!



*I'm no longer selling Scentsy, so this is not a ploy to get you hooked on the product; however, should you love it and need more products, I have a coupla girls that would LOVE to help you out!

Giveaway

Tomorrow I'm puttin' on a lil giveaway for you wonderful friends of mine!

It's fun. You're going to like it. At least I think you will...because I do!

So. Tomorrow. Be here or be...um, yeah, that...






-- Post From My iPhone

Under Construction

Edit! New Header!

In the process of re-workin' le' blog.

So, at the moment my header is a little disturbing.

Bear (bare?) with me!

Thanks!
Sarah