Hi, I'm not dead

Relieved, aren'tcha?

I have stuff I could blog.

Like Spice wearing 6 pairs of underwear over her diaper.

Like Sugar's tooth is loose and I now understand why my mother had such a fascination for wanting to pull my teeth out when I was a kid.

Like how I've met several of the most funny peeps ever from Twitter, in real life in the last week.  Last night I laughed harder than I've laughed in ages because of these folks.

I could also tell you that I'm considering pole dancing classes.  I could also tell you that when I mentioned this to Josh his response, after laughing aloud, was to ask if I needed a job.

I could tell you how when I talked to my FIL on the phone yesterday he told me he loved me before he hung up.  And how, having your dad say those words is salve to any heart wound.

I could tell you how it's weird to not have my mom around.  How it hurts my mama heart when Spice says, "I miss her."  Or Sugar says, "it feels like we'll never see her again."  They voice aloud what I keep to myself.

There was also the instance last week that I never shared.  When I went to Victoria's Secret to buy new undergarments, as mine are too big, and before going to VS I was tweeting with my friends about male associates at VS and it was brought up that men would be on a waiting list to get that job.  Well, let me just tell you that I about DIED when I was holding a hot pink thong and some kid, some male kid says to me, "are you finding everything you need?"  I choked.  And dropped the panties.  And told him that I was finding everything I needed.  Then immediately tweeted that  THERE IS A MALE ASSOCIATE IN VICTORIA'S SECRET!  And that I was old enough to be his mom.  You know, if I'd birthed him at 14.

It was funny.  Maybe you had to be there.  Or on Twitter.

I could tell you about an email from Chelsea that I got this morning talking about her horse and his parts and how we almost assaulted him for no reason.  Thank goodness she paid a vet to come check him out so we uh, didn't have to check him out for all the wrong reasons.

There's also the funny little story about how I decided it was a good time to get back on my bike only to fall off the bike.  Twice.  And have a bruise that takes up almost the entire left thigh.

Today I was at McDonald's with friends when I run into a friend of mine from high school (I mighta mentioned him a time or 12 on this blog.  I always try to disguise who he is though.) :)  He had his niece and nephew with him.  And his nephew (who happens to be the son of one of my best friends, Candee) got stuck up in the toys at McDonald's.  I told him he was going to have to get his own nephew.  He told me that I was going to have to get his nephew.  And so.  Me.  The girl so scared to death of heights, climbs into the toys at McDonald's.  Climbs to the top.  Finds the sweetest little boy with a tear running down his cheek just staring at me in the netted tunnel.  And while I'm coaxing him along, I'm yelling at his uncle that I'm going to kill him when I get down.  If I ever get down.  And he, of course, just smiles.  So, sweet little man and I make it through the tunnel and down the slide to his uncle.  Where I'm thanked for my bravery.  I sent him a message later telling him that he owed me for saving the life of his nephew.

Well, that's a little of the excitement around here.  Spice wants a diaper change.  Sigh...