Sometimes ya just gotta suck it up

I don't like to camp. Not.at.all. I don't see it as a vacation. I don't like to be dirty and sticky. I don't like bugs. I don't like to go on "fun, little trail hike" things.

I'm just not a fan of the whole camping thing.

But I'm going this weekend. Yee.Haw.

We're going with the Couples Group from church. We went last year and it was toootally outta my comfort zone (Mindy) because we didn't know many of the couples yet. But it was fun and we made friends, which surprised me because I was myself the ENTIRE weekend.

I'm sure it's going to rain the whole weekend and bugs will raid our food and tent. Thinking there will be bears, too. Hoping no one notices the fact that I haven't shaved my legs in about a month, personally, just find it too time consuming. I also think I'll end up forgetting something extemely important and not knowing until it's too late. Hopefully it's not the tent.

Since I'm going to have a fantabulous weekend, I sure hope you do as well!!!

She's Funny.

I've told Amber a few times she should start her own blog. She's hilarious. She has kids, a husband, a dog and other issues. Perfect blogging material.

But she would say, "noooo."

Then, last night, she sends me a message that she's started one but she might delete it.

Me: I'm looking forward to reading your blog.

Her: Well, don't hold your breath.

Me: Holding my breath.

Her: Well, then say hi to your dad for me.

Seriously, laughed so hard. Love this girl.

Today is the day. The day that I put on my BGP's (Big Girl Panties) and realize I haven't been a size 2 for almost 3 years and I'm likely not to be, again. But I held onto that dream these last 3 years and held onto the clothes as well. They're boxed into two tubs, labeled "Skinny Clothes" and today is the first time in a long time I've allowed myself to look at them.

Clothes bring back so many memories. The outfit I wore to the Gary Allan concert, my first size small, GAP, cableknit sweater, in PINK, that I oh so loved. The $118 GAP skirt I bought in Kentucky for $19.99! (Remember Mindy!?) So many clothes, so much money spent on clothes.

While I was going through them, Josh was here for lunch, he could tell I was sad. He asked, "if you were that size again, how many of those shirts would you actually wear?"

And he's right. I've changed alot since I was able to wear them, many of the shirts are pretty snug, or if I leaned over, would show my back...and well, I'm just not into that. One shirt actually says, "Angels on the road to ruin little lost girls." I didn't know it when I bought it, just loved that it was part tank top, part t-shirt, if that makes any sense. The lettering blends in so much I didn't even know what it said. A little embarrassed by it now.

So, I'm in the process of getting everything washed. I signed up to sell on eBay. Once everything is washed and dried, I'll be putting "lots" together of shirts, skirts and pants.

Yes, I'm sad. But I realized I'm hoarding. I can't take those clothes with me when I die. I obviously can't wear them right now. So, someone ought to be able to.

Pretty ridiculous that it's taken me so long to do this, but I'm doing it and that makes me proud of me.

I love Crayons!

You Are a Blue Crayon

Your world is colored in calm, understated, deep colors. You are a loyal person, and the truest friend anyone could hope to find. On the inside, you tend to be emotional and even a bit moody. However, you know that people depend on you. So you put on a strong front. Your color wheel opposite is orange. Orange people may be opinionated, but you feel they lack the depth to truly understand what they're saying.

What Color Crayon Are You?

I really think it fits me, even if I hate to admit being moody! :) If the shoe fits...right?

Sombreros and Kenny Chesney make for a Great Birthday

Amber's special day is over but the memories...oh they were good. I made a crown for Ms. Amber and she wore it proudly.
We went for Mexican food. Our server wasn't too keen on us and we still don't know why. But she brought the crew out to sing to Amber, sombrero and all!
We didn't understand anything they sang but for the rest of the day, Amber referred to herself as "Panchita." Later in the evening we went to Amber's parents for dinner and cake. Food was great (so was the company) and the gifts were wonderful...can't go wrong with some Kenny Chesney CD's! Think I may have grabbed her rear to get her to smile. Hey, it worked, didn't it?! Hope you had a great day, Amber, it was fun being a part of it.

They say it's Your Birthday!!!

dun uh, dun uh!

Happy Birthday to the greatest girl ever.

My "anonymous" friend, Amber.

Amber, who joined the cancer club with Melissa and me.

Amber, who couldn't throw the cone out of the 'possum fast enough, resulting in us getting caught.

Amber, who drove 400 miles with me to see the 20 year anniversary of Dirty Dancing on The Big Screen.

Amber, who painted my toenails while I lay in a hopsital bed with an IV hooked to me and a 6" gash in my tummy.

Amber, who has made me PJAL, one too many times.

The Amber whose nose is 1/2 a rolo larger than mine, had to point that out. And Amber, who loves Grey's, so much we decide to marry the characters. Seriously, without this girl, not sure what I'd do. She gets me...and still likes me. She's also the girl who stole the last two drops of wine that were in my glass. She's the girl who makes it hard to cook for because she doesn't like onions and mushrooms and I don't know how to cook a meal without those two things. Serving her cereal next time. Today, we're going to lunch. Just us. No children. Which is really exciting because we always, I repeat, always have children. (Not sure whose children they are, but they follow us) I have a present for her. Not quite as cool as the "I carried a watermelon" t-shirt she gave me for mine but it's still a fun gift. So, "Ammer" here's to you and YOUR big day! Happy Birthday, I love ya!

The Heart and Hurt of a Child

Since I haven't blogged enough today for a months worth of posts, here's another!

This weekend I was around a young mother I've known for quite a while. Neither of her children were "planned" so to speak and she had them both at a pretty young age. They are fairly willful children and if they were mine, I'm sure I'd have a bumper sticker that read, "my children drove me to drink." But that doesn't change the fact that they are still children. And children are needy.

I heard the most heartbreaking words come from this young mom's mouth to her older child, but in the same breath she's praising another child that is not her own. Her young child, not quite three, looked defeated. I'm not going to defend what the child was doing. It was wrong. However, I'm learning that when your child does wrong, deal with it in private. Humiliating your child will not make you a better parent in the eyes of your friends or family. And it will not cause your child to behave any better or trust you-at all.

I want my little girl to know that I believe she's number one. I may love my nieces and my nephews and my friends' children, but she will always be number one to me. I want her to be secure in my love for her. I never want my words to crush her and make her cry out to another mom to take her home with her.

This post most likely makes no sense. I can't find the words to say what I'm wanting to express. My heart was just breaking for this small child. And I wanted to share this story in case there is a parent out there who shows favor to another child besides his/her own and may not have realized it. It's so easy to become blind to our own habits that we can often times forget who those habits hurt the most.

Others.

If you've read these already, #52-66 are new

love cats but have a dog.

2. My favorite color (at the moment) is red.

3. I chew my fingernails.

4. I don't like it when people chew with their mouths open.

5. I love to laugh and make others laugh, too.

6. I'm afraid of heights.

7. I'd rather hold a snake than a spider.

8. If my house were on fire and I could only grab 3 personal items (assuming husband and child are safely outta the house) they would be:
a. my scrapbooks
b. my KitchenAid mixer-it's red!! My best anniversary gift yet!
c. Jaylee's baby keepsakes

9. I love to have my hair played with.

10. My first boyfriend's name was Rusty. I was in 6th grade, he was in 5th grade.

11. I have two sisters.

12. Both younger than me.

13. But I'm the shortest.

14. I love chocolate.

15. I love to cook.

16. I've had 1 speeding ticket and 3 seat belt tickets.

17. The last seat belt ticket should have been a speeding ticket, I was racing the cop. He let me off easy.

18. My middle name is Lee. Yes, like the baked goods. Sarah Lee. But I have an 'H' that makes me cooler.

19. I don't like to be a passenger in a car unless it's my husband or father-in-law driving.

20. If it didn't snow or rain ever, I'd just own 37 million pairs of flip flops. Love those.

21. My dad drown in a boating accident when I was 19.

22. I now have an irrational fear of the water.

23. I'm trying to get over it.

24. I love receiving gifts, but prefer to have them in a box and wrapped. No gift bags, makes the opening go too fast.

25. I'm 26.5 years old.

26. I have a My Space account. It's been fun to connect with friends from High School that I haven't talked to in 9 years.

27. I'm still close to 3 of the 4 girls I had as bridesmaids in my wedding.

28. My husband is my best friend.

29. I knew I was going to marry him before I even knew his name. I'm serious. I just knew.

30. I'm 20 lbs overweight.

31. I can't believe I just admitted that.

32. I want to homeschool my daughter.

33. I'd rather clean 100 toilets than do dishes.

34. I watch Grey's Anatomy.

35. I wish I could stop but I'm terribly addicted! :)

36. I no longer have a cell phone.

37. I just started clipping coupons from the Sunday paper, that is so fun!

38. My favorite food is Mexican.

39. I love Sangrias.

40. After 22 years my sister and I are friends.

41. I threatened to run away when I was 4.

42. My mom offered to help me pack.

43. I didn't get far.

44. I love to scrapbook. I use Close to My Heart products.

45. I love to mow the lawn.

46. We used to own our own lawnmowing business.

47. I sell Pampered Chef.

48. I'd rather have McDonald's than Burger King.

49. I don't like to make New Years Resolutions.

50. But I'm going to this year.

51. I'm done tidbittin'....for now!

52. I drove 400 miles round trip to see Dirty Dancing on the big screen. It was the 20 year anniversary. I had the time of my life.

53. 4 of the previous 51 tidbits have changed.

54. I was caught driving by the house of a kid from school, while a certain friend of mine (Amber) threw a road construction cone in his yard...3 weeks ago.

55. I PJAL'd (peed just a lil) when that happened.

56. I love to go bowling.

57. I'm terrible at it.

58. My favorite author is Karen Kingsbury.

59. I don't think I've done any of the things on my list of New Years Resolutions.

60. I can't bake a pie. I don't make really yummy chocolate chip cookies, like Treena, but let me tell ya, I make a mean bowl of cereal.

61. Taco Salad is my favorite thing to have for dinner.

62. I don't eat meat anymore. Well, not very often anyway.

63. I have curly hair.

64. That I got from my dad.

65. My shoe size is 6.5

66. I've posted on my blog 3 times already today. Quite obvious that I have a clean house and sleeping child.

Alright...there's a few more just-so-super-exciting-you-just-had-to-know stuff about me!

For those of you that are Grey's freaks like myself. Here's a sneak peak of what's to come.

One more month. Just one. And life will begin again! Woo Hoo!

Something not to do in the Car

You know how when you're at church, during worship and your heart just fills with praise and you close your eyes to thank the Lord for all that He is?

Well, this morning, I'm driving to get coffee (so much for cutting back) and I'm listening to some song, can't even remember it now and I close my eyes...

...and then I realize, whoa! I'm driving, can't be doin' that while I'm driving! Just have to have a heart of praise with my eyes open this time.

@#$%

See, there was a reason I didn't want to tell you! Right after I get finished publishing my last post I went out to my MIL's school to help with her classroom, she offers to buy lunch....

and that's right. I did it. I fell off 'er.



And by the picture you'd think it was a graceful fall. That I didn't mean to, it just sorta happened while I was looking at the pretty flowers. But no, I didn't fall off my wagon. I jumped ship! She ordered burgers from this wonderful little, greasy stand, that quite honestly I'm not sure how it's still running, legally. And that burger, mmmmm. But after a couple of bites into it, I could feel the cow trying to kill me. So, I ripped off the bun...pulled him out...

and fed him to the kid.

Anyway, just felt completely guilty and had to confess.

Thanks for letting me play Catholic.

I'm Just Gonna Say It

I wasn't going to, in fear that I'd fall off the wagon of sorts and then be embarrassed. But, two weeks have passed, and I've yet to fall off my wagon.

This could be a case of TMI, but that's okay, we're all friends here. And who, among friends, has never talked about their digestive system, huh?

My digestive system: not so great. And now that my large intestine is two feet shorter than normal, I've decided to help it out.

By cutting out meat.

That's right ladies and jellybeans, I've gone vegetarian. This is no easy feat for someone who loves her red meat. I'm not one of those people who loves chicken and fish, they aren't my faves, not at all. Nope, I want a big fatty, still moo-ing chunk-o-steak. So, to give up my red meat is pretty tough.

When I first decided to "try" this out, and I say try like "try" because I never want to commit to anything because I usually fail miserably, Josh's first words...

"What are you going to eat when we go to McDonalds?"

Sad that we eat there so much that he's concerned I'll never eat again.

But I quickly figured out what I could eat. Get a McChicken, take the chicken part of the McChicken off and put in some french fries. So, I still have that crunch, just no meat. And as I'm writing this, I realize how "healthy" I'm trying to be while I eat at McDonalds. Pffft. Anyway...

So, it's been over two weeks and I've not eaten meat. Yeah, me. And I must say, I do feel better.

I'm not imposing this on my husband and child. I still cook it for them. The only time I'm tempted is when I cook bacon. That's the toughy. I've made a couple vegetarian meals and basically they just seem like side dishes. And I've learned I do not like eggplant. Bluuuhhhck! Not a fan. I've learned I like the Morning Star brand of veggie burgers over Boca. And I've learned eating lots of beans and vegetables causes, uh, gas. :)

For the most part it's not been too bad. My goal was to try this out for a month and see how it goes. 2 weeks down, 2 weeks to go!

I'll keep ya updated, 'cause I'm sure you really wanna know.

White Trash Version

Oh, the husband.

Sunday was my MIL's birthday. I made her cake. Since my name is Sarah Lee, it just wouldn't have been right for me not to make her cake.

I drove it over there on my own, seeing as how the husband took the child on a bike ride and was going to meet me over at the in-laws. I ask how I'm s'posed to get the cake over there without it falling all over the place.

He rigs something up. Leaves on his bike.

The first turn I make...

you guessed 'er, cake fell.

Praise the Lord it didn't fall completely off the pedestal plate I had it on. I pull over, grumbling that the husband would go for a bike ride at such an inopportune time. I kinda, sorta, but not very well fixed the cake.

We sing happy birthday. Husband is dishing ice cream and asks, in front of everyone mind you...

"Did you use a Sara Lee brand cake mix?"

"Nope, I used Duncan Hines. Had I used Sara Lee it would have been about 37 bucks for the box instead of 2."

"Oh, Sara Lee's an expensive brand?"

everyone in the room, in unison, "yes!"

"Well, then I'm glad I married the white trash version."

With everything that is on my "to do" list today, I'm sorta wishing I was back in the fifth wheel.

Would make cleaning go so much faster, seeing as how there was waaay less space.

This morning, as I looked at myself in the mirror (scary...scary sight first thing) I saw some greasy hair and realized, in the midst of all my self inflicted chaos the last couple of days, yeah...I've forgotten to shower. Uh huh, it's been three days since I last showered.

How gross am I!?

You don't have to answer, I already know.

A Bad Day gets Worse but Funny

Ready or not, here I rant.

Today is one of those days where I question my decision to be a stay at home mom.

I'm posting this, knowing full well it's possible I'll be looked down upon for what I say but it's also possible someone will hear and understand, have been there and know what to say.

She's just been making me crazy. I don't know what it is. Most likely it's me and my lack of patience. I am beyond selfish when it comes to time for me. I want it. I don't get enough of it. I get more "me time" than many SAHMs, but still I want more. Yet I can't even imagine time without her. I don't like being without her. But there are days, like this one, where I think I'm gonna go nuts!

We met Josh for lunch today and he commented how she was being overly talkative and whiny and didn't know how I do it all day. I was wondering too. Days like today push me to the edge.

The post title would make one think there's a funny part to the story. Oh there is...

So, after we have lunch at "McDunna" I decide to continue being out and about since we're always at home. We go to Penney's and they're having a shoe sale. Totally scored but that's beside the point...I have 4 pair of shoes, I set Jaylee in a chair, tell her to be still and stand in line. There are sunglasses for half off. The ones I own are real cheapies that I don't really care for, so I justify getting new ones. I find a pair I like and add it to my pile.

She rings me up, comments on how good Jaylee is, I say "thanks" but I'm thinking "want her?"

We leave. I pull out my new sunglasses, pull off the tags and stick 'em on.

We start to drive away and this man next to me is staring at me like I'm a weirdo. Which I am, but how does he know?! Yeah, so right now, about 2 minutes before I started typing this post I realize why.

On top of my head are my old sunglasses.

Uh huh, I was wearing both pair.

At the same time.

Like a moron.

It made me feel like an idiot but it was also funny. I had to laugh. Here I'd been taking myself and all my daily "trials" so seriously today and then I look like a goober in public.

"My name is Sarah, and I'm a moron."

When I have nothing to blog about, you get a video

This just about made me PJAL (pee just a lil)

Kinda panicked a lil bit...

Yesterday I came out of Lurkerdom, remember, it's an actual place...and in doing so, the girl whose post I commented on, ended up heading on over to my lil place and reading my blog! She even left a comment.

And then I panicked. Jeana...the girl I think is hil.air.ious, left a comment on my blog. I panicked because she is sooo funny and I realized I sooo am not. And once again I felt inferior and so totally almost deleted this lil haven of mine in fear she may return and wonder why the heck I even have a blog in the first place.

Fear not (cause I know y'all were worried)...I didn't delete me. Obviously. I'm trying to just be happy with how I blog and what I blog about, and be thankful for girls, like Jeana, who have a blog where we can go if we feel the need to pee our pants.

I'm tellin' ya, that youngest son of hers, kills me everytime.

So, Jeana, thank you for visiting me in my lil neck of the woods. You're welcome anytime. Just know that I get a lil tongue tied and sweaty and possibly a little light headed when you're here. But you're always welcome, nonetheless!

I'm feeling a lil...

sheepish...if you will.

So, I posted earlier that it costs me over 10 grand for coffee a year. Seriously, what was I smoking? Yeah, my math, it's not so good. The actual amount, should have read, $1170. Maybe I should have gone to college.

Then I wouldn't be so baaaa-d at math.

This my friends...

...is what it looks like in my laundry basket. Emptiness. It's a beautiful thing. It's all F'APA (folded and put away) too! I am one happy camper. I was inspired here and here to do something. And while I didn't make a jillion meals or make homemade jam, I did:

-Get up at 6 am to make breakfast for Josh and Jaylee
-emptied dishwasher and reloaded with breakfast dishes
-tidied living room
-washed and folded the last 3 loads of laundry
-cleaned Jaylee's room, which consisted of going thru toys and clothes she no longer plays with or wears (if anyone is in need of toys, let me know, I'll send 'em your way)
-made lunch
-tidied bathroom
-let child live another day

Okay, so the last one I have to do, everyday...and today, since she's quite cute, it wasn't hard to do. :)

Good luck with your chores today, whatever they may be...and remember, some is better than none!

I need it to Live...

*edited because I put in the wrong amount for what it costs me per year to be human, the original post said $10,700. Yeah, I'm a dork
...okay, maybe not to live, but I need it to be a nice, functional, happy human being. I will be the first to admit, I'm an addict. I don't try to hide the fact. Sometimes I try to hide how much it costs to be an addict of this kind, but there's no hiding that either. It's a spendy lil addiction.

Coffee. Not coffee outta-the-coffee-pot coffee.

Frilly, foofy, spend-way-too-much coffee. From a stand.

A place where these two girls know my name.


I get a really happy feeling when I show up and they say, "Just yours or his too?" They know what I want, what I really really want. Today, I said, "Just mine." And they go to work. Gracie, the girl in yellow, trained me when I worked here 4 years ago. Being a Barista was an awesome job. Hard work. But fun work. In the morning, sometimes you're the first person your customer sees, so it's important to greet them with a smile and "good morning". There were definitely days when I wanted to spit in some drinks but I can honestly say I never did it. I loved my "regulars" and still see some of them around town and we'll chat about their kids, grandkids and pets. Sometimes when we pull up to the stand, there will be a rig in front of us that I recognize, and I'll tell Josh, "hot, skinny, 12 oz. mocha." And he just smiles. Today, while waiting for my coffee I was reminiscing my Daily Buzz days and it was fun. I had such good times there.
Then Patty, the owner, says, "here ya go." She knows I like two skinny straws, not one fat one. And I love that she knows this. Love even more, that she plays along with my silly quirk and gives them to me. I hand her my card, that is completely punched out thus making this drink free. She tells me to "have a good one" and I'm on my way. Now, I'll be nice, functional and happy. It really doesn't take much for that to be. Just $3.25 a day. $97.50 a month. $1,170 a year. Oh my heck! Breaking that down is really ugly. Really. Ugly. So, I'm going to enjoy this coffee, lots because she may be my last.
Okay, admittedly, this probably won't be my last. But I'm vowing to cut back a lil.